Lucas is all about how he just wants them to be together, and then whines about how she signed off IM to work, and what was up with that, and before he can really get his guilt-trip on, he almost passes out. Peyton notices he's running a huge fever, and goes to call his mom. Lucas, displaying an uncanny survival instinct, gasps, "She's with Mom." Peyton looks panicky.
Back at Karen's Kozy Korner, Karen says she should go check on Lucas, and Brooke twinkles, "Will you let me?" Karen replies, "No, Creepy! He dumped you! Let. It. Go. Start a scrapbook about how he dumped you, if you must, but don't continue deluding yourself that Lucas is going to think of you as his own personal Agnes Von Kurowsky. There is no Farewell to Arms in your future -- it's more like This Boot Means Goodbye."
Oh, she does not. She releases Brooke into the wilds of Lucas's bedroom, but the habitat is empty. Just then, the phone rings, and Karen gets the news from Peyton that Lucas is in a world of hurt. "Can you get him to the emergency room?" she asks. Why couldn't Peyton have thought of that one on her own? Anyway, Karen announces that she's gotta go, and Brooke invites herself along. Oh, Brooke. So sad.
Once we return from commercials -- and let me just say, the WB commercials are much more entertaining than the CBS ones -- Lucas is lying on a hospital bed, Peyton at his side, when Karen and Brooke come in. Karen demands to know where Lucas was, and Brooke says in a near-whisper, "Peyton." Lucas lies that he was down near the river court, and lucky for him, just as he began feeling rotten, Peyton just happened to swing on by. Peyton's all, "Gotta go! See ya!" Karen instantly twigs to what just happened, and thanks Peyton icily before rolling her eyes and indicating that Lucas will get what for as soon as she gets him home. Lucas says, "I'm sorry," and Karen shoots back, "You should be." She gears up for a lecture, and Lucas is all, "Mom! Just wait. Not now." I think he's under the impression that the parent-child relationship is some negotiation of equals here. Maybe it's because his mom looks like she's only five years older. Brooke takes off too.
We transition to Dan's dockside abode. Nathan comes up. Dan does the hospitable thing and offers him a drink. Why not? Nathan looks thirty. Dan more or less acknowledges this with, "You're old enough [to drink]." Before Nathan can tell Dan he's planning on living with Deb, Dan steamrollers him with a passive-aggressive spiel about how being a controlling and intrusive dillweed is Dan-speak for "I love you," and then caps it by threatening to air all Deb's dirty laundry. So if Nathan loves his mommy, he'll move in with his dad. A little manipulation with that nightcap, son? Freshen up that drink? Twist the knife a little more?