MONDO EXTRAS

11:24: Clearly, Dustin Hoffman volunteered for this gig of introducing alongside Charlize Theron because he knew he'd be at boob height.

11:24: Adapted Screenplay award is on deck. We called this race very narrowly for Silver Linings Playbook, but were prepared to be wrong.

11:25: And we were. Argo wins, putting the big prize one tantalizing step closer.

11:27: Original Screenplay next. We had said Django...

11:28: And we were dead on! This time, QT gets to accept his Oscar without some future ex-con named Roger Avary standing next to him potentially hogging the spotlight.

11:29: Wow, playing the guy who wrote Django Unchained off with the theme from Gone with the Wind? Clearly, the musicians are starting the feel the length of this telecast too. At least they didn't have the sheet music to Birth of a Nation.

11:34: Jane Fonda and Michael Douglas stroll in all casual-like to present the Oscar for Best Director Not Named Ben Affleck. We're sticking with our Spielberg prediction...

11:35: And are proven decidedly incorrect. Ang Lee wins his second Directing Oscar for Life of Pi. Fun fact: the last time Lee won -- in 2006 for Brokeback Mountain -- he also beat out Spielberg, who was up for Munich. Apparently, we've found the Bearded One's Kryptonite.

11:38: The awards are coming fast and furious now. Sad to think about all the musical numbers that were probably scrapped at the last minute. Actually, no it's not.

11:41: Jean Dujardin brings his considerable French charm on stage with him to present the Best Actress Oscar. We're still predicting an Emmanuelle Riva upset over frontrunner J-Law...

11:44: Nope, youth ends up trumping age. Now the next three Hunger Games movies can trumpet the fact that they star an Oscar winner, which will make up for the fact that they're being directed by the guy who made Constantine.

11:46: Meryl Streep resists the urge to deck Lawrence for her Golden Globe "joke" and instead gets down to the business of naming the Best Actor of the year. If it's not Day-Lewis, we're retiring from the prediction game.