Schillinger boys: Forgiveness makes you better at math.

When we come back from the narration, it's like we're on Law & Order: Racist Victims Unit all of a sudden. Warden Leo and Lenora Briscoe are questioning the guy who created a diversion by screaming like a banshee with a spoon up its ass on the night Mayor McDaveDuke died. The inmate blames his screaming on a really bad itch, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense until Leo threatens him with capital punishment and the scene hits its punchline: "Death row? For hives?" Okay, heh. After a gratuitous flashback reminds us of how Gorge Bollocks met his untimely fate, it's Billy Clyde Tuggle's turn in the interrogation chair. He lasts about ten seconds before squealing (like a pig, of course) on the guy who hired him.

Who turns out to be a guard named Johnson. Has this guy been on the show before? Because I've never seen him. Anyway, Leo finds him in the mailroom and smarmily asks him about the brand new Jaguar Johnson just bought. Only he seems to be pronouncing it "Jag-U-R," which I'm just going to assume is an homage to this episode's equally odd alpha-numeric title. Personally, I'm just happy they didn't also include a Se7en shout-out and have somebody get raped with a razor-blade dildo. You know they totally wanted to, though. Johnson, who's clearly not too bright, lies like Ben Affleck's toupee and denies any involvement in the crime. The instant Leo leaves the room, however, he immediately dives for the nearest phone and direct dials his (as yet unnamed) evil overlord for further instructions. Yeah. Because none of the phones in a prison are monitored or anything. Moron! Then again, there's a another telephone scene later on that would seem to suggest that I'm the moron here for even expecting this show to make sense in the first place.