Animal Farm

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B- | Grade It Now!
Is That A Bestiality Reference?
A propos of absolutely nothing: Dido really needs to shut up. Please go down with the ship, honey.

A propos of something: The title of this episode has absolutely nothing to do with the George Orwell book of the same name. Although there is one reference to an "Orwellian" law, it's much more 1984 than Animal Farm, so what I'm saying is: Brush up on your junior-high-school reading, Fontana.

We see a butterfly in close-up. I hope against hope that it means that Jame Gumb is now saying to Hill, "It puts the lotion in the basket," but no such luck, as Hill tells us about the Butterfly Effect, which, like the episode title, has absolutely no relevance to this episode. Will the surprises never stop?

Beecher awakens as count is called. He looks like he's had one too many beers, not one too many jars of moonshine (meaning "one"), but what do I know about hangovers? If you said "Enough to fill a volume the size of the Encyclopedia Britannica," you're not wrong. Beecher sits up slowly and stares at the empty jar on the floor, which he totally would have broken in his drunken state, by the way, and just sits there staring at it, instead of, perhaps, HIDING IT. Lord. Diane enters and tells him to hurry up, but he says he's not feeling well. It doesn't take her long to figure out what's what, and she leads him out. Cut to Pete's office. McManus asks Beecher where he got the moonshine, but Beecher isn't forthcoming. McManus: "Who brought it in? Fairies? Or was it Keller?" Hee. "Fairies." Maybe I've read A Midsummer Night's Dream too many times, but that makes me think of Keller as Oberon. In which case Beecher would certainly be Bottom. Beecher says he bought the moonshine from a guy in Unit B. Way to give up true information there, pal. Remind me not to give you the name of my contact. If I had one, of course, which I don't, because that would be wrong. Beecher doesn't give up the guy's name, probably only because he doesn't know it, and McManus threatens him with time in the hole, and I'm surprised that Beecher didn't ask if he could share a cell with naked Keller. Who's not in the episode at all, by the way, just so you Kellerites watching in reruns know to give this one a miss. Pete asks to talk to Beecher alone, and McManus pissily leaves. Beecher regretfully says he was doing so well, but Pete points out that he's had a lot of stressful things happen to him lately, and deduces that the man Beecher is in love with is Keller. Brilliant reasoning, considering that Keller's his new roommate and all. She writes him a note as she says she's going to let him sleep it off in the hospital wing this one time. "You drink again and I will kick your ass." Lace up the size nines, sister.

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