Animal Farm

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B- | Grade It Now!
Is That A Bestiality Reference?

Hill wheels himself up to Schillinger in the cafeteria, and without a trace of irony asks how much it would cost to mail him out of Oz. See, I knew his sanity couldn't be unaffected by the monologues. Schillinger's all, what? Hill says he's trying to think of ways to get out. Schillinger: "Escape from Oz?" Bzzzt, Vern. That's the next episode's title. Anyway, once he's sure Hill is serious, Schillinger turns him down, he threatens to tip Hill's chair, Hill calls him ugly and stupid, and scene! Dude, where's my subplot?

Adebisi gets another note from Shirley, and smiles. Some random notices, and Wangler tells him that Adebisi is in love, giving him the backstory on the note passing. According to Wangler, it's only been going on for a week, so for once we have some idea of the timeline, and given that scene cuts in Oz can mark anywhere from several seconds to several months, that's of no small importance. Ryan goes into the supply area, where Adebisi is sitting reading the note, and tells him he wants to come back to the kitchen. Adebisi: "No." Ryan asks if he hasn't always been there for him. Adebisi: "No." Hee. Ryan says he's the only friend Adebisi has. Write your own "with friends like these" joke here. Adebisi changes the subject, asking if Ryan can read. I certainly hope so -- I wouldn't want to think that all that time I stood outside Oz with that "CALL ME RYAN" sign was for nothing. Ryan says yes, and that he thought Adebisi could too, which he can, but not all the words. He asks what one says, and Ryan reads "brawny," which he defines for Adebisi. Adebisi: "I'm brawny!" Ryan: "Yeah, among other things." Hee. These two really have great acting chemistry. You probably think they have other chemistry too, but I don't read fanfic, so I wouldn't know for sure. Ryan takes the note and tells Adebisi that the next day is Shirley's birthday, and as it will be her last one, she'd like to celebrate by seeing Adebisi naked and sucking his cock. Adebisi asks where it says that, and Ryan shows him. "Fellatio? Cunnilingus? Girlfriend can spell!" Hee. That cracked me up for some random reason. Adebisi says he wants to meet her, and Ryan says that if he can arrange it, he wants back in the kitchen. Adebisi: "O'Reily, if she sucks my cock, I'll suck yours." Ryan smiles: "That's an appetizing thought." His face falls. "Pass." Hee. Ryan leaves.

In their pod, Ryan tells Kirk that Adebisi will be taking his mop duty the next day. Kirk doesn't want to hear that, as apparently Shirley's as reliable as Old Faithful in displaying her nether regions. Ryan says he'll have to deal, and hands him a magazine with some girl-on-girl porn, and I don't really need the image of Little Timmy coming out to play, so this is another scene I'm glad they cut short.

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