Oz
Escape From Oz

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: C+ | 4 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
See No Evil

Gloria is working in her office when McManus stops in and asks how she is. She says that she cleaned out her husband's closet that morning and boxed up his things. In one morning? And I figured Preston was a WASP -- they save everything. Proving my point, she says Preston had seven unmatched cuff links in his drawer. McManus asks her if she wants to have dinner, not like a date, and to his credit, he does seem genuine. However, Gloria turns him down, and he turns to go, but stops because he has to ask her something about Ryan. "Do you think he really loves you?" Gloria unhesitatingly says yes. "No one will ever love me as much as Ryan O'Reily. And I have to live with that fact every day for the rest of my life." Gloria, sorry about your husband and all, but boo. Fucking. Hoo. McManus leaves.

Projecto-Hill tells us that you can escape from Oz through drugs and alcohol. It shouldn't surprise you, then, to learn that it's Beecher's turn in the glass cage. He tries to take a drink of liquor, but his bottle's empty. I snicker as I slurp whiskey through a straw.

Flashback to the Beecher/Keller kiss, and then Keller gets out of the Hole. In a nice touch, Alvarez is still screaming. Beecher's lying around like a drunken slob when he sees Keller walking back into Em City. Beecher gets up excitedly, and when Keller enters, puts his hands on Keller's shoulders and asks for a kiss. Keller looks down all, "And you're touching me because...?" and observes that Beecher's drunk. Beecher's all, duh, and suggests that they consummate their relationship, if you know what I mean, and I think you do, judging from the THUNK of jaws hitting floors at the prospect. Keller's in George W. mode, however, as he disappoints a nation, saying that not only is he not interested in dancing the horizontal mambo with Beecher, he doesn't even want to be in the same room as him. He walks out, and Beecher trails after him like a pathetic lovesick puppy. He tries to touch Keller again, who jerks away. Beecher apologizes for whatever he did, but Keller tells him that he did some thinking in the Hole, and he decided that the two of them are due on the now o'clock train to Splitsville. Beecher, in a panic, tells Keller that he can stop drinking, and grabs his arm again. Keller looks down again, and then shoves Beecher across the room, much to the delight of various onlookers. Keller walks into the shower as Beecher leaves, crying. Everyone laughs at him except for Ryan and Cyril. And as upset as Beecher is, he's going to learn soon that there's always a much lower place to go. Unless you're Brad Kern. Later, Keller plays a board game as Beecher watches forlornly. Beecher buys more liquor from Guerra, who openly laughs at him. Harsh. In their pod, Keller gets into bed as Beecher undresses miserably. Keller looks at him impassively before turning over, and Beecher climbs into bed for a nice cry.

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Oz

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