Strange Bedfellows

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now!
You Never Forget Your First Time

Pete tells Giles that Beebe killed her husband, and he confirms it. She asks -- strangely unemotionally, given how she acted the last two episodes -- if he can tell her about it. Giles manages to convey that Beebe saw that Giles witnessed the murder. Pete asks if he knows why Beebe killed her husband, but he doesn't. She presses him, but he breaks down crying, and she holds him. Aw. Later, in Glynn's office, Pete has asked him to let Giles out of solitary. He refuses, on the grounds that Giles is still prone to violence. Pete says she'd like to do something special for him. Cut to a hack bringing a box into Giles's cell, saying it's from Pete. From the music playing, you'd think it was full of grenades without the pins, but it's full of toothbrushes and toothpaste. Looks like Pete came in third on Jeopardy or something. Giles is thrilled. She even threw in mouthwash! Nothing says "I care" like Scope. Or maybe it's just that that hug reminded her of the heartbreak of halitosis.

Infirmary. Shirtless Ryan. Nice. Ryan says hello to a kvetchy but amiable doctor. Ryan's hair has grown back to crew length, and he doesn't look like a refugee any more. Now I'll take that full disclosure! He plies the doc for some medicinal marijuana. Doc: "Nice try, kid." The doctor says that this will probably be Ryan's final chemo treatment. Ryan's happy to hear that; then, having held out for all of twenty seconds, he asks how Gloria is. We flash to a man that's ostensibly her husband getting into a car. Cyril pops up in the back seat and wraps a garrote around his neck. As Gloria's husband chokes, Cyril averts his eyes from the rear-view mirror, which is a nice touch. The guy's arm breaks the driver's side window in his death throes. Back in the present, the doc tells Ryan that the funeral is Thursday (no indication of what day it is presently) but that Gloria might be back at work tomorrow. Ryan brazenly tells the doc to give her his best, and the doc warily says he will, as behind him, Ryan's wife Shannon appears. She comes over and starts nuzzling him, but he pushes her off, smiling coldly that she hasn't been to see him lately. She says she's been taking care of Cyril. Ryan says he called his cousin, and he's going to take Cyril. Not for long, Mickey. His next words are the equivalent in length and intent to Homer Simpson's famous quote: "Dear Baby. Welcome to Dumpville. Population, you." Ta ta, Shannon.

Gloria gets dressed in the locker room. I assume this is the next day. McManus enters and asks her what she's doing there, but she counters that work is all she has at the moment. She goes on that she and "Preston" didn't have the best marriage, but they did really love each other. She sighs, "Why'd he have to die?" Cue the flashback continuation, which consists of Cyril being chased down an alley and arrested by several cops. "Prisoner Number 98P284. Cyril O'Reily." Murder one, life, parole in sixty. In the infirmary, Pete and McManus break the news to Gloria. We don't hear all of it, but Gloria says, "Preston is dead because of me!" Yeah, it's true, and no amount of Aim is going to make that taste go away. Cut to Gloria marching resolutely into Em City with McManus in tow. She enters Ryan's cell, and he tries to hug her. She pushes him away, and struggles to find these words: "I became a doctor to help people. Now I know that that sounds like a cliché, it sounds naïve, but it's true. I could have a fancy practice anywhere, but instead I chose to work in Oz. I saved your life, O'Reily. And in return you destroyed mine." She stares for a moment longer, and walks off. I must say I was extremely pleasantly surprised by that speech -- it had such potential to be maudlin or hysterical, and it's not that either of those would have been completely unjustified, but I much prefer Lauren Velez's emotional but resolute choice here. Excellent job. McManus enters after Gloria has gone and informs him that Cyril confessed, and goes on that although Cyril refused to implicate Ryan in the murder, the cops still want to interrogate Ryan. McManus turns to go, but Ryan calls him back. "You gotta see that I love her, man." You know, when McManus has what I think is good reason to call you pathetic, you're really hitting your low point as a character. McManus asks what he knows about love, and Ryan is all, what do you know, and could we get to the slap fight already? We move downstairs, where Hill blathers some nonsense about beds of roses. Cyril is led into Oz, because murder trials of mentally challenged adults take a day and a half.

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