The Routine

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
We're Off To See The Wizard

Hill continues about Oz being hard time. We see a man, folders in hand, entering an office. Although we haven't yet seen his face, I'd like to describe his outfit: tan shirt, brown sweater vest, and purple baseball cap. Consistent Theme #2: McManus is a tool. The tool in question barges into Glynn's office, eliciting a mildly reproving comment, and blathers about the new arrivals he wants in Em City: Beecher (okay), Alvarez (in the hospital). They exit to find Healy using rather HBO-esque language to chew out a prisoner. Upon seeing Glynn, he offers a sheepish, "Hey, Warden." He completely ignores McManus. Since this is the first episode, I'm mentally awarding pluses and minuses to the characters based on their actions in order to rediscover how I feel about them. And Healy ignoring McManus definitely gets him one or two marks in the "plus" column. McManus continues that he wants Groves. Glynn repeats the name, and says not to take this the wrong way, but "Are you out of your fucking mind?" Score one for Glynn. By the way, it looks like McManus is wearing Timberland-esque boots to complete his outfit. Corey Feldman, Mark L. Walberg, Ryan Seacrest, and Brian Dunkleman would make a less toolish ensemble. Glynn continues that Groves is a sociopath without a shred of remorse, as he killed and ate his parents. McManus: "I'm gonna teach him table manners." The first "ha ha, not, McManus" moment down. Only 3,687,236 to go. Glynn opines that the only thing a guy like that understands is "punishment, hard and swift," which neatly illustrates the philosophical struggle that will color the relationship between the two men for the run of the series, and also makes me giggle at the gratuitous use of the phrase "hard and swift." God, I love this show. McManus and Glynn reach the solitary wing as McManus blathers on about the necessity of radical change, puffs his "chest" out as he says he has total autonomy to run "Cell Block Five," and threatens to call the Commissioner. Shut up, McManus. Glynn gives a world-weary sigh (one down, 297,008 to go), and gives Groves to McManus on the condition that he also take a prisoner called "Markstram." McManus complains that Markstram is a petty drug dealer, and this is such a classic example of what a self-aggrandizing dickhead McManus is, like, he only wants to spend his effort on the murderers so his successes will seem even more impressive and his failures won't seem as glaring. Glynn hands McManus Markstram's folder, says that Markstram is his cousin, and walks off, effectively shutting McManus up. Glynn, you're my new best friend! Call me every five minutes!

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