Julia knocks on Adam's door, and he answers. She tells him she's been thinking about what he said about "the process." He sighs and says he doesn't want to talk about writing anymore. Julia says she's not talking about writing, and shows him the book she is holding, which is titled The Beginner's Guide to Tantric Sex. Oh sweet Jesus. There is no amount of money in the world that could compel me to continue here. Do you all really want to know what happened in this scene? Fine, but I'm just doing this for you guys. Julia comes in and tells Adam (who keeps looking through the book) that she's always worried about the end, and so she wants to try Tantric sex because if you do it right, there is no end. That's all I'm going to say about that. Go talk to Sting if you need to know more.
Holly shows up at Bailey's house. They do that thing where they both say "I was wrong" at the same time, then Holly tells Bailey to go first. Bailey says Holly was right because Fiona only sold two things. Holly says Fiona is home singing about them at home. Bailey says Fiona is convinced that she is launched in the fashion world, and that he realizes (about forty minutes after the rest of us) that he was just into it because he thought that if fashion was Fiona's calling then he could find a calling for himself someday. Holly says that Fiona was dancing around the living room last night while Holly was "sweating over an organic chemistry midterm." Holly realized that she is "the one who's allegedly going somewhere" and Fiona is "the one who is allegedly going nowhere" and that Fiona "is doing a hell of a lot more dancing at the moment." Then the director forgot to yell cut because clearly that was the money line of the scene, but then it continues for about five more minutes with Bailey and Holly just looking at each other.
Claudia is warming up in the rehearsal room. Todd walks in and says she is sitting in his chair. Claudia says it's still her chair, and the conductor just let him finish that take. Todd says they'll see who's sitting there in an hour. Claudia starts playing furious scales or something and Todd takes out his violin and plays the first line of "Dueling Banjos." Claudia plays the response line back. Suddenly, it's a hoedown with the two of them playing the song together. I grab my jug and start hooting on it while my cats start square dancing. Could this show get any more stupid at this point? Just when I think we've reached a low point, they bust out "Dueling Banjos." Anyway, they finish and then look at each other breathlessly, like they just had non-Tantric sex and talking about how they only made it through together. Then they make out while "Dueling Banjos" swells in the background. I swear to God, I am not making this up. Claudia breaks away to say she is still going for first chair, and Todd says, "Good." Then they kiss again while the song continues in the background. I can't believe I just witnessed that scene. Dueling banjos, for crying out loud.













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