Previously on Party of Five: Stephanie Tanner brought a printout of a web page to school, and it said mean stuff. Claudia "Nancy Drew" Salinger figured out that Cameron wrote the mean stuff. Kirsten wanted to have a baby with Charlie. Julia needed Evan's help with her book. Sarah went to New York City for a short trip (which could turn out to be true if Time Of Your Life continues to suck as hard as the first episode did) and promised to call Bailey every minute.
Victor is apparently going to be Owen's nanny now too. He tries to tell Bailey about his parenting philosophy, which basically boils down to "whatever the client wants." Owen steals Claudia's bagel. Bailey tries to clean up the kitchen. It's chaotic. Bailey says that Owen can't go trick-or-treating because there might be sharp things in the candy. Lighten up, man! If you're really worried, take the candy to the hospital and have it x-rayed. Although I always suspected that the radiation exposure was more harmful than a possible straight pin, but I digress. Victor suggests they make a haunted house instead. Bailey says they can't because he needs to clean up the house for when Sarah comes back "any day now." As long as "any day now" means "when her show gets canceled," he's right. The phone rings. Claudia answers it and it's Alexa. Bailey follows her around and bugs her to get off the phone in case Sarah is trying to call. Owen tells Victor that none of his nannies last for more than a couple of days. Victor rolls his eyes. Everybody wants to be closer to free.
Evan is crossing out line after line of Julia's writing. She protests and he spouts clich├ęs about writing that I heard from my high school English teacher. She says that he's not just editing some writing -- it's her life. I think she really needs to get some distance from her writing if she wants to go anywhere as a writer. Evan ignores her and keeps crossing things out. Julia tells him that their conversations are always about work, and he says he's got a deadline. I don't know why she's still there -- clearly, he doesn't need her around for this part. She says that they never have human interaction, like talking or telling a joke. He stops and says he doesn't know any jokes, and asks if she does. She says, "Not really." He edits some more. At this point, he has crossed out practically the whole page.
Bailey is standing on the street, talking on his cell phone. He asks Owen if Sarah called. He spots his friend Will and gets off the phone to go say hello. Bailey hugs Will and asks when he got into town. Will says he's been there for a few weeks or maybe a month, and he was going to call when he got settled in his new job. Bailey asks what happened to going to college. Will says that he's taking a year off and working for the Wrestling Federation. He actually says he's doing an internship, but that kind of implies that he's getting school credit, doesn't it? And since he just said he's taking a year off from college, I'm going to just say that he works there. I prefer to make fine distinctions like that. ["I don't know how it works at the Wrestling Federation, but when I worked at a Canadian magazine, we had people who worked for a pittance and didn't get school credit, and we called them interns. But of course it could work differently in the U.S. I'm just sayin'." -- Wing Chun] Bailey asks if Will went to college to intern for wrestling, and he says "wrestling" as if it makes him physically ill. I would like to direct Bailey's attention to the fact that the WWF just completed a successful IPO. Surely he, as a businessman, can appreciate that. ["Also, back when Bailey was an alcoholic, wasn't he on the wrestling team? What a hypocrite!" -- Wing Chun] Will says that his parents reacted as Bailey did, and that he wasn't sure if Bailey would want to hear from him. If memory serves, the last time we saw Will was last season when he got his girlfriend pregnant and was pressuring her to have an abortion. Bailey says, "You're my...we go back a long way!" He asks Will to get coffee, but Will has to do a pickup at the airport. Bailey agrees to call him at his parents' house. Will gets into his car and suddenly Bailey slides into the passenger seat. Will asks what's going on and Bailey says it should only take an hour to get to the airport and back, and he has an hour free.