The Subplot Of Ick meets The Smirk Master. Mason approaches Robert at the buffet to ask him how to convince a girl to sleep with him. This sounded absolutely horrible at first, but I relaxed when this scene took place, because then I knew that Mason wasn't going to get any. Robert tells Mason that deep down, all women are whores and want to be treated as such. That way, they don't have to pretend to be better than they really are. At home, Mike Binder takes notes (because it's not like he's going to be doing anything else on Friday nights), completely unaware that Robert is a complete caricature and that we're supposed to be laughing at him, not his smarmy jokes. He tells Mason that whatever he does, never "give a girl [his] heart. Because she'll rip it out, chop it up, and wash it down with a chardonnay." Umm…okay. Robert's mad at Catherine's betrayal, right? I think this ranks at about a seven on the incest scale. Mason thanks Robert for his "advice" and wanders off to make a great big ass of himself.
A bored Boopsie wanders outside to get away from yenta Lillian. She hears some music from somewhere and starts heading towards it. Parked out on the street, Tom is leaning against his car, sucking on a Tootsie Pop, and listening to the blues. Tom must lead a very bland life if he just sits around at parties waiting for his brother. A blues singer on the soundtrack repeats "I got me some" as Boopsie heads over to Tom. I tried looking up the song and singer, without luck. Anyway, Boopsie walks over and stands next to him, leaning against the car. Without saying a word, Tom pulls another Tootsie Pop out of his pocket, unwraps it, and offers it to Boopsie. She accepts it and begins sucking on it, lustily. Tom looks at her as if he's not certain whether he's just gotten incredibly lucky, or into deep trouble. Neither of them says a word. End scene.
Inside, Henry's (alleged) mother is chatting with some woman about getting their kids together for a "play date." God, I hate that phrase. You're letting your kids play together. It's not a damn meeting or something. Henry tentatively approaches. The two women glance at him briefly, but since neither recognizes him, they don't pay him much mind. He slowly draws closer. Page finally notices that he's been staring it him. Henry opens his mouth like he's going to say something, but nothing comes out. Page looks at him nervously for a second, then turns away uncomfortably and continues talking to her friend. I don't blame her for the nervousness. Henry looks like he's about to pull out a gun and accuse her of transmitting secret messages to the space aliens that work at the KGB through his fillings, and then blow her head off. Henry loses his nerve and turns to walk away.