The Rat

Episode Report Card
Shack: B- | Grade It Now!
Do you know the McGuffin man?

Back up in her room, Lily, still thumbing through Mom's yearbook, finds a picture of a girl named Meredith Weller who looks just like the girl in the locket she got from Phillip Parker. Lily goes to check the locket to see if the picture matches, only to discover the locket missing.

Meanwhile, Will and Catherine have gone to bed. Catherine stares blankly at the ceiling while Will says that he's glad it's over and he hopes Catherine forgives him. Catherine weakly responds that she does. Will tries to kiss her, but she pulls away. She turns away from him to go to sleep; her face finally betrays some emotion as she looks pretty wrecked and begins to cry.

When we return from commercials (shut up, Howie Long), Pilar is trying, unsuccessfully, to set up rat traps while Catherine impotently warns her to be careful. Mason comes down to suggest that Pilar might have gotten rabies, probably because I haven't told him to shut up yet. Shut up, Mason. Mom tells him to knock it off, but he points out that rats carry all sorts of diseases, and maybe Pilar has gotten the bubonic plague. Mom tells him that people don't get that any more, but Mason says they do; he saw it on When Animals Attack. Seriously, Mason, shut up, and don't give the Fox network show replacement ideas. You're going to snot yourself right out of a job. I dread the possibility of Mason getting a subplot of his own. Will and Lily come down separately. Lily asks if anybody has been in her room, because something's missing. Catherine suggests that perhaps Lily has misplaced it, but Lily insists that it was in her desk. Nobody thinks to actually ask what is missing. Mason claims that he was in Lily's room, but all he did was read her journal and urinate on her bed. Everybody say it with me: "Shut up, Mason." Are you drunk yet? Catherine finally asks what Lily lost, and she passive-aggressively responds, "I think you know." Catherine professes ignorance; Lily tells everybody to stay out of her room.

Will escorts the kids outside to bring them to school. He asks Lily what her problem is. She tells him that Mom went to high school with Phillip. Will acts like he genuinely didn't know this. She tells him about the locket and accuses Mom of taking it. Lily is wearing a shirt stolen from Stevie Nicks's closet. Will broods for a microsecond, then tells Lily to cut Mom a break because "she's going through a lot right now." Lily asks what Mom is going through, which stops Will dead, as he can't figure out a diplomatic way of telling Lily that Daddy's loins have gone astray. So he just tells her it's complicated and to give Mom a break. Lily sarcastically shoots back to him that she's glad everyone's being "open and honest with each other," a promise he made to Lily last episode. Okay, so Will's daughter is immune to his charms, too. Will's just out of luck.

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