Pirate Master
Bribes, Lies and Vengeful Eyes

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M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Bribes, Lies and Vengeful Eyes

In the wake of Christian's departure, Louie and Kendra are bitter -- Louie over the loss of his "brother," and Kendra because it's going to be that much harder to pull up the anchor. But several crew members agree that Joe Don needs to go. Except of course Cheryl, who's sitting in the Captain's Quarters enabling the dude so she can continue to rake in her 25% of each week's take. Will that bite her in the ass? Or should I say, will it bite her in the Joe Don?

After the credits, Jay has recovered well from Joe Don's outing of him, establishing that the crew doesn't realize the extent to which Jay is backing the Captain. "Event Coordinator" Jupiter gets a miniature hero sequence in which she gets "credit" for everyone's eye makeup. Now I feel bad for Nessa the makeup artist, because I blamed that on her last week. In addition to having to look at Jupiter's amateur messes on everyone's mug, she had me trying to pin it on her. Sorry about that.

As the Picton Castle sets sail, Jupiter rhapsodizes about being on the ship, and "Glass Blower" Laurel tells us how much better it is than living in a van like she has been for the past year and a half. But Alexis thinks it's harrrd, dude.

The ship drops anchor to the north of the island, and Cameron calls the remaining fourteen pirates to the quarterdeck to open the next compartment on the chest of Zanzibar. It's getting easier for him to say that with a straight face. Apparently, this week's treasure was hidden by Henry Steel's quartermaster, whose big thing was writing codes in blood. The teams are divided by the same method as last week, where Joe Don and his officers lead the Black crew. Louie's way too happy about being on the Red crew against Joe Don, promising to "write a letter to his mama in his blood." So the Black crew has Joe Don, Cheryl, Ben, Sean, Joy, Alexis, and Laurel, while the Red crew is everyone else. Oh, all right: it's Kendra, Jupiter, Christa, Nessa, Azmyth, Louie, and Jay. I confess, I don't spend enough non-Thursday time thinking about these people to keep most of them straight myself, so I can hardly expect you to. The Red crew is happy to have Azmyth, no one more so than Azmyth: "Obviously, the team I'm on is gonna win," Azmyth interviews. But Joe Don is already counting his money as the longboats head to shore.

Cameron narrates the upcoming trail the pirates will have to follow, which includes a sabotage point marked by a sword and skull. This particular sabotage point appears to be a long, flimsy lean-to tent of bamboo poles that will drop down across the trail with the cut of a rope. We'll see how that works.

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Pirate Master




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