At Pirates Court that night, Joy, Christian, and Kendra stand in the dock while Cameron explains how it works and calls court into session. Joe Don starts by explaining why he Spotted the ones he did: Kendra's slow in the water, Christian is large but slow, and Joy is injured. Kendra goes first in her own defense, saying she wasn't the best swimmer, but was plenty fast on land. Alexis's bitchface is unimpressed. Joy shows off her lack of a knee bandage, and says she was there hauling up the anchor at 4 AM: "I'm Joy, and it ain't time for me to go yet." When Christian comes up, he says it's a captain's job to keep the crew happy, and promises to share the cash more equitably if he's made captain. He asks Joe Don, "How do you run the ship?" Joe Don says he won't take the bait, and when it's time for him to make is own case, his big argument is, "You know how I roll. I say what I do, I do what I say. I think you guys are happy, and I'm okay with that." Cameron senses Louie's displeasure, and Louie gripes that he's only got $4,400, while Joe Don has ten times that. "It's less than that," Joe Don says. "I've shared money with my Bosun." Jay looks sick in the ensuing silence, but says, "He's given me a thousand dollars so far and $200 dollars for being on the losing team." Joe Don smirks at having hung his spy out to dry. Alexis says that the amount they got from Joe Don was worse than nothing. So she's giving it back, then?
Ballot time. Cameron reminds us that a mutiny requires a unanimous vote, and the nine jury members come up to spike their vote cards on the dagger. Azmyth gives Joe Don a long (if not mutinous) look before his vote, as does Sean. Cameron counts up the votes, and says that there are no votes for mutiny, which means the Captain is safe. So is Joy. And in a 5-4 vote, the person who's being cut adrift tonight is...Christian. He and Louie share a regretful look as Joe Don comes down from the top deck to cut Christian loose. Guess you didn't play that one too well, you guys. Christian climbs over the side and onto the raft (which is of course the same raft John sailed off on, complete with electric lantern and hidden trolling motor), and Joe Don does his thing with the sword again, sending Christian out into the night on his floating taxi. Christian interviews that he'll miss his fellow crewmen the most. Even the assholes?
You know, once you get past the initial shock of how stupid this show is, you realize that it's actually kind of boring.