Platinum Hit
Kiss The Flame

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Last week: Sonyae won for the fifteenth time in a row, Johnny acted real gross and went home, and Nick continued to be the worst thing in all of history.

Everybody looks all sleepy next morning, and Nick cracks his usual shitass kind of joke before his eyes are fully open. Nice to know he can go there without any prep time at all: What to us is a simple alarm clock is, for Nick, a call to arms. "How can I be my worst self today?"

Nick: "Next I'm going after Jes for no reason."
Jes: "Next I'm going after Nick because my sense of self in Johnny's absence is still negligible."
Sonyae: "Okay, but if Johnny was the strongest one besides me, then you should be glad that Johnny is gone."

Sonyae's sense of reality crops up in the most surprising ways.

Jes: "Johnny was like a piece of home for me. Literally, because we both hang out with the same hipsters."


Is the name of the Tyra Mail that Nick finds and tosses to the group to wonder about.

Jes: "You can interpret that meaningless phrase in so many ways."
Nick: "I think it means we have to make out with Scotty. Because he's a fag, get it?"
Scotty: "Four fingers pointing back at you, little fella."

Jewel: "Nick, stop pretending that we're friends. We're not friends. Let's meet the EIC of Spin and hear his crackpot theories."
Sonyae: "He looks so smart, this Doug Brod. He walks smart, like an editor." [Note: Doug Brod was laid off from his position as Spin's EIC in June, before this episode aired -- Ethan]

Jewel: "'Kiss The Flame' actually comes from a song I wrote. I really have no idea what I'm talking about a lot of the time -- I'm something of a Knight Without Armor in that respect -- but I think I meant something about running toward danger. Now I want you each to interpret my bizarre lyric in your own way, and sing it to me while I am fed grapes by the editor-in-chief of Spin magazine. Then you will chew up all these pieces of bubblegum, and create a portrait of me using chewed-up gum. Then you will each get tattoos of me kissing various things that are on fire on the body part of your choice."


Brod: "When I want to get pumped up, I listen to Queen's "We Are The Champions." Then that reminds me that I am thousands of years old, and I calm down again."

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Platinum Hit




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