Point Pleasant
Human Nature

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Human Nature
Oh, yuck -- here comes Jesse. He wants to meet with Christina in private later to "talk." Right, because that's something he's so very, very good at. When Christina says that she thinks they shouldn't see each other anymore, he pretends that was what he wanted to talk to her about, not that he wanted to make out with her some more. He wishes her luck with the stupid boat parade, and you can tell she's thinking, yeah, whatever, you dumb freak. Oops, actually, that was me thinking that.

Christina boards the Kramers' boat, and Meg puts a light-blue sash over her doily. It's disconcertingly shaped like a pageant sash, and I think it says "Sea Maiden" on it. That's good. Otherwise the judges might have mistaken their theme as "Giant Doily." Meg pets Christina's hair and tells her how pretty she is while Judy sits nearby and looks slightly hurt.

Paula is angry with her mother, who has not shown up yet, even though it's almost time for the launch. Her anger seems a little out of place, considering this is just a dumb boat parade after all, but since their mother-daughter dynamic doesn't exactly feel like the most happy or functional one around, it's possible there are other issues at play.

Dr. Ben announces that he cannot start the boat. The reason for this becomes clear to the audience when Ribcage holds up some sort of boat…part…in front of Paula and says, "Don't say I never do anything for you." Christina and Judy wonder if Paula's crew has anything to do with the Kramer boat not starting. I keep waiting for Christina to start the boat somehow magically, but since she was never that keen on being in the parade anyway, she doesn't expend the effort.

Doc Kramer's pager goes off, and he says he has to answer a 911 call at his office. That's kind of odd, but okay. It's fun to see Meg freak out because she and the good doctor had plans for a night of spontaneous sex. What do you mean, you forgot? Didn't you write it down in your calendar like I told you to?

And now comes the moment that you've all been waiting for: the boat parade! Just kidding. If you've found your way to this site and made it this far in my recap, I'd be very surprised if you gave a rat's ass about the stupid boat parade.

Doc Kramer's 911 emergency turns out to be Amber naked in his examining room. How the hell did she get in there anyway? Don't these people lock their doors? Doesn't he have drugs in his office? And how can I get some to ease my pain? Dr. Ben hands Amber her dress and tells her to put it on. She's probably looking for reassurance about her self-image more than sex, but Ben is too pissed off to offer her either. As she continues to whine, he relents and grudgingly attempts to make her feel better about herself. She keeps pushing for the sex, though, and he finally flings her from him so that she slams into a wall and falls down. "That's going to leave a mark," Amber says, and she fully intends to blackmail Dr. Ben with it. When he tries to talk her out of it by appealing to her better instincts, she shakes her head and gets in a pretty good line: "After tonight, it seems I can sink pretty low."

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Point Pleasant

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