I'm Like a Turd! I Will Not Flush Away!

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C+ | Grade It Now!
Smells Like Teens Sucking

Fifty-seven people got the "elusive" callback. Cue Narrator Sound Clip #3 from last year: "Bringing them one step closer to their dream." Montage of people celebrating. Strangers clutch each other and cheer.

We're going to Chicago next to see a pretty girl who just became a mother. She sings well and has incredible lip gloss. Can she do it without being a karaoke DJ?

They spelled Britteny's name wrong in the interactive game. I love it. Oh, and 64% of you think that it's going to be "tough" for those two kids to stay together in this business.

Chicago. "Another crush of hopefuls lines up for a shot at instant stardom." Oh, narrator. Now you're just teasing me. Jaymes shows the girl who has the #1 slot, since none of us will ever see her again for the rest of our lives. Two girls met at the audition, and now they're best friends. Someone tells us you can't get the experience from just watching this show on television.

Angela Peel, nineteen, from Chicago, wanted to audition last year, but she was pregnant. Now she's got a three-month-old named Angel Christian and she's got his name tattooed on her arm and she's ready to go. She wears a bindi and sings pretty well. She's got timing and a personality. I like her. She's got great eyes, by the way. She's this year's Shaunda, I'm afraid.

Marcus Terell Butts, eighteen, Kansas City, MO, has decided to change the words so that he's singing directly to Jaymes. I don't know how, but it works, and they call him back anyway. Angela gets called back as well. She says, "Honestly, this is a good thing for me, getting this audition, because I'm nineteen years old. Having a baby. I thought my life was over with, but apparently not yet." "Thanks, Mommy," says Angel Christian.

Lindsey Pearlman, twenty-two, from Chicago, was not my best friend last year. She made the second round of callbacks but was cut. I don't think I was interested in her, and I do remember that she cried. This year she's my best friend. She's got better hair, better makeup, and her mom came with her. She tells the camera that she's feeling it this year, that she slept outside on the sidewalk and she brushed her teeth and spit in a coffee cup and she's feeling rugged. She roars like a lion and announces that she's ready to go. Unfortunately, she's just not that good in the audition. Her voice isn't all that great. They don't call her back. She tells us that she thought she did really well, but apparently she's not what they're looking for. She starts crying and says it sucks to get rejected. Poor girl. Go do comedy. That's what all of us rejected girls end up doing. You'll love it, Lindsey.

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