The Blur of Tears

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C+ | Grade It Now!
Oh, That Corner? That's the One We Put Baby In.

Oh, this song. This Popstars song. It will never leave my head. I've been singing it for days. Days, people. If this also gets released as a single, I might just have to leave the country for a month.

Big props to my new VCR, which is playing the last recorded episode from my last VCR. From now on, smooth recording. Oh, damn! I thought I had figured out finally the closed captioning. Turns out the VCR doesn't record the television's closed captioning. I'll be deciphering mumbles again this week. Curses!

Previously on Popstars: a zillion girls have been cut. Ten remain. In the montage of past weeks, we see girls for the first time. I'm not even going to bother. I'm also not bothering with the narrator's voice-over, which again states that this is a dream that thousands tried out for and now only a handful of girls remain. They're in Los Angeles, and they're at this workshop, which they've been calling "week-long" forever, and now it's pretty clear there were only three days in this "week." That's life in L.A., people. You don't get up until ten and your work week starts on Tuesday and is over on Thursday. Love it. We see the montage of the Six of Sad from last week, where there are tears and dreams shattered. Alexandra gets in one more sobby headshake, just for old time's sake.

The narrator tells us there's another day of the workshop. Again. Christina tells us she's "kinda scared for today." Five more girls will be cut after today's workshop. Petagay says they've made a pact today for "no more crying." Yeah, okay. They're only going to do a high-five whether or not they make it. I'd like to take bets on that. The remaining fifteen girls will be "pampered, primped, and styled with complete makeovers." Then, "a performance at one of L.A.'s hottest clubs: Johnny Depp's The Viper Room." There's a shot of the awning of Viper Room, showing that there's no "The" in the title. Five more will be cut after the performance, leaving ten for the hour-long show next week. Slow Tiny Squares of Girls and Fun fill the screen, kicking off this blur of a half-hour.

"To be one of the five would complete my dream." I think that was Cheaza that said that. I'm not sure.

Christina says again, "I'm kinda scared for today."

Sad piano music kicks off as Keitha Lind starts crying in slow motion. Cut to her talking to the camera. "My roommate went home last night," she tells us. "And, oh! She broke my heart!" We see a shot of the crying Curtisha, leaving the room for "some air." "It's…it's sad," Keitha Lind says through a gigantic smile.

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