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Ur-ine Trouble (2)

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Gustave: D+ | Grade It Now!
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Nothing's campier than cancer!

Shout-outs to Sars, Alex Richmond, Djb and Strega for a super weekend hanging out together in dive-y Manhattan bars, eating Belgian fries, drinking Jack Daniel's, spending lots of money, and talking shit about the people around us.

Last week: A Kennedy student no one really knows falls under the drowsy rapture of a certain cherry-flavored over-the-counter narcotic and dies. The administration does an investigation. Harrison's urine tests positive for "drugs," but Josh takes the rap. Brooke and Harrison run against each other for student council president. Carmen, Sam, Nicole, and Mary Cherry run each other for Homecoming Queen. Michelle Phillips guest stars as Chem's nemesis Hellacious Akers, a four-time Kennedy homecoming queen mentoring Mary Cherry and Nicole. The ratings plunge.

Josh is not kicked out of school or anything, but he and Lily and Harrison are having this heated discussion in the hallway in the aftermath of Josh's bust. There are all these jerky NYPD Blue camera movements. I guess now that there's a drug-oriented plot line, the cinematography just had to get really sketchy. I'm hoping that's also the explanation for the mullet that Josh is growing ever so slightly. Can't you just see the pre-production meeting with wardrobe and hair? "I was thinking that since Josh is going to be kinda skanky this season, I'd grow out the back of his hair a little, what do you say, Ryan? The eighties are back."

Harrison and Josh glare at each other, but in less of a sexual way than usual. Lily looks helpless and grief-stricken, like some U.S. Marshals had just burst into her home and stole her nephew from her. Josh tells Harrison that he took the rap for Harrison, and warns them that Krupps is going to be doing random drug testing. Josh reminds Lily to do some herbal detox. Lily is so sorry she ever got Josh into this mess. Josh doesn't accept her apology and stomps off. "Harrison, are you sure you're not taking drugs?" asks Lily. Harrison is all "face your own demons." Like, pity the state any of my friendships would be in if I actually said "face your own demons" out loud to someone. Lily does the Million Man March outta there. Harrison reaches into his locker and pulls out a bottle of Vicoburin, a codeine-based pain reliever. "Take one every hour as needed for severe pain," says the prescription. He throws them in the trash. Well, that does it. I'm calling my doctor tomorrow and having him hook me up with some of those. Maybe I'll find out who Melanie Griffith sees and pay him a visit.

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