Brooke and Sam are getting ready for school in the Palace bathroom. Sam is wearing this royal blue robe and she's still got that Barely Legal eye make-up happening. She's also got Boy George's hairstyle from the "Miss Me Blind" video. And Brooke is the superficial high-maintenance one? Brooke tells Sam that Mike and Va-Jane-Ah have given them responsibility of naming the baby. Sam then has the nerve to go off on Brooke for fooling around with Harrison during Spring Break. Brooke explains -- and quite rightfully, I might add -- that she didn't do anything wrong since, as far as she knew, Sam was with George and had no claim on Harrison. Finally Sam realizes that Brooke isn't to blame and neither is she. They both decide to get revenge on Harrison by playing him like he played them. They give each other a high five.
Credits. Again Jamie Kennedy comes out to tell us that Face Time is brought to you by Dr. Pepper. And that Dr. Pepper makes the world taste better. Wow, the body isn't even cold yet and already the sponsors have forgotten that there's a show called Popular that's actually supposed to be the main attraction of this next hour.
Mrs. Ford's apartment. Josh is getting ready for school, putting a piece of fruit in his bag and whatnot. Mrs. Ford enters wearing a clingy black Dacron turtleneck with no bra underneath over a sand-colored knee-length skirt. And let's just hope that it's chilly in the Ford apartment because otherwise Mrs. Ford appears really really excited to see her son Josh, if you catch my drift. Mrs. Ford has some excellent news. "Looks like my days of temping are over," she says, putting her hands behind her waist and thrusting her torso into Josh's line of vision so he can see just how cold it is in that apartment. Temping? Um, last we saw Josh's mom, she was working as a guidance counselor at Kennedy and dating the football coach. Something's been glossed over here. Sounds like someone lost a job due to sexual misconduct. "Did you get a job?" asks Josh. "I got a great job!" says Mrs. Ford. "A tax-bracket-changing job!" I guess it was only a matter of time before Josh's mother found out about lucrative opportunities in the sex industry.
Josh is all excited for her and starts doing it with her right then and there. After they both climax, Mrs. Ford explains that she actually hasn't gotten a job as a sex worker in a whorehouse that specializes in middle-aged Seven-Sisters graduates; rather, she's going to be a human resources director at a company called Five Comp. "Apparently they flipped over my psych background," she says. Um, yeah. Mrs. Ford? Your "psych background" consists of dropping out of college -- where you were a psych major -- to get married, and then working a connection due to your son's athletics to get a job as a guidance counselor at Kennedy, where you promptly started doing it with one of your co-workers and got fired or something a few months later. That's not exactly a psych background. And furthermore, who "flips" over a job candidate who has a bachelor's degree in psychology? No offense to anyone who is studying psychology, but isn't psychology the most popular major at most colleges because it's the easiest workload? Nevertheless, Mrs. Ford is relieved that she can pay Josh's college tuition. Josh is also happy to hear that, but feels bad about the expense. "Maybe if I'd have stayed on the team I could have gotten a scholarship," he says. "No scholarship is worth your unhappiness," says Mrs. Ford. Huh? I thought Josh loved football. The only reason he's not on the team anymore is because he was kicked off for doing drugs. What's with rewriting history to make Josh a sensitive mama's boy who always hated football but just went through the motions to please his father? According to his locker room conversations with Sugar, he loved the sport. "Oh, and one more thing?" says Mrs. Ford gravely. "Five Comp is in St. Paul, Minnesota. So we're going to have to move." Josh is all, "Well, I can't move. My whole life is here! My friends! Lily!" Mrs. Ford points out that she has to take the job or they won't be able to send him to college. Josh suggests that they ask Dad for "help." Mrs. Ford tells Josh that his father made it abundantly clear that if Josh didn't live with him, he wasn't going to pay for anything. Hello? Mrs. Ford? They're called divorce attorneys. For the friggin' forty-seventh time, look into hiring one. California is a community property state. Josh gets pissed off that he wasn't consulted about the move. Mrs. Ford assures Josh that the job is the solution to all their problems, and she can't afford not to take it. Josh is all, "You mean 'all your problems.'"