Emily: "Which test?"
Ezra: "All of them! You already know the answers, you just need confidence."
Emily: "Dude, you are worse at tutoring than you are at keeping your hands off little girls. Are you under the impression that Dumbo was a documentary? Because it wasn't. It included a talking rat that wore a drum major's uniform. Does that seem realistic to you?"
Ezra: "Emily I was going to save this until the end of our training, but I think you're ready."
Emily: "...This is a feather, Mr. ... Person. This is not helping."
Ezra: "Just bring a flask and your iPod to the makeup exam, and then do what you gotta do. Blaze up. Take the edge off. Frankie Say Relax."
Emily: "Mr. Person!"
Ezra: "What are they, gonna take away my teacher's license? I'm gonna lose my job I don't have? This is the first time I put on pants all week, and even that was the subject of much internal debate."
Aria spots Jenna, on her way out to the carpool lane, and takes care to quiet her footsteps, lest...
Jenna: "Aria, is that you? Aria Montgomery? I recognized the generic ringtone everybody on this show has. Listen, I was going to call you tonight..."
Aria: "Gross, why?"
Jenna: "I lost my accompanist for next week's assembly. He was partially eaten by the spiders that live everywhere in my house."
Aria: "I don't know how to play any instruments any more, sorry."
Jenna: "Come on, it's an easy piece! Just a couple of rehearsals and we'd be good to go. So you want to come over tomorrow? Just look out for spiders!"
Aria: "No. I don't want to. We're not friends. I hate you. I blinded you, I blew up your eyes, and I still hate you, is how much I hate you."
(Um, you could have just said to call her boyfriend? Noel Kahn? Who totally can play the guitar? Who is like, the best guitar player ever, of all time? You could have just said that. But no. Had to get all Aria on it.)
Aria: "I'm helping my dad with a ... project, see? And he's over there honking, I mean waving, yeah? That's the ticket. Waving. So I gotta go."
Jenna: "Have fun, you pretty little liar."
Because Jenna can totally see what's going on! Because she's not blind! Oh, Aria. These little white lies. And another thing that's not fair is, if Hanna has to visit Mona, and Spencer has to visit jail -- not to mention her frequent trips to the Lost Woods to recreate a three-dimensional hologram in spacetime of Mona's many costumes, don't forget that shit, ever, for the rest of your life, because it's fucking phenomenal -- and Emily has to go on creepy coffee dates with Ezra Fitz, the least you can do is risk Jenna's spider army laying eggs in your hairdo so you can go through all of her shit. Right? Like just this one time, engage in the show you are on?