Pretty Little Liars

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
"Car Rental? Ashley, You Could Rent A Yurt!"

Emily: "Weird. But anyway, look. Maybe you shouldn't put quite so many eggs in the Jenna basket. Let's rethink our price range here."
Nate, verbatim: "Would you quit 'busting my chops'? I wouldn't even be buying her this gift if the hottest girl in Rosewood was available... Or interested in guys."
Emily: Heroically does not barf. Kick him to the curb! He's not even really her cousin I bet!
Cece, swooping in: "...You totally picked my favorite! Those earrings go great with unnerving eyeballs."

Emily: "That chick really just did me a solid. I hope she's not as completely, utterly, totally untrustworthy as she seems. And is."


Zack is another barista at the Brew, older than Kevin but still in that general LA-hottie area of appearance. I remember him from Love Bites, which was so good and nobody ever really watched it. That was at times some of the brightest, funniest writing I've seen on TV in a long time, especially in a format like that where every word counts.

Zack: "Coffee, lady? Perhaps a delicious croissant?"
Ella: "They smell better than the perfume I'm wearing! What are you?"
Zack: "Some vanilla custard, some just butter."
Ella: "First of all, nothing is ever 'just butter.' How about just a decaf? And hey, is Emily here?"
Zack: "No! Everybody abandoned me! I'm not usually out here at the counter, where you can see me on this TV show. That's why you've never seen me on this TV show."
Ella: "Thank God. I don't want my daughter's best friend to see me on a first date."
Zack: "Hold up, you're on the market? Sweet. Play it cool, Zack..."
Ella: "It was the Internet."
Zack: "So I'm probably the last person that will ever see you alive, heh. Aw, fuck. Good one, Zack."

As expected, Ted enters at this point. Man, Ted is in it to win it, is he not? Rummage sale, internet dating, being a stone-cold fox in public all the time... This is a man with a strategy.

Or a crawlspace.

Ted: "Oh, you ordered your coffee already? I was thinking we should hit that ice cream truck outside."

Ella shoots Zach a cute, cute face about how so far she is not dead and Ted is, if anything, cuter than his profile picture. Zach tries to be supportive, but you know Zach. Sucker for those raspberry jewel-tones, especially on a MILF schoolteacher's midi-dress.

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Pretty Little Liars




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