Jason: "Ladies, hey. Don't worry, Specer, I won't talk about our little secret in front of Emily. Listen, I have more mystery things belonging to Alison -- these were from when Maya's family packed up all her shit. She left it on my porch like a flaming clue, and then vanished."
Spencer: "Reiterate for me that you found another bag of Alison's stuff, without all that boring Maya stuff cluttering the sentence."
Ella: "Ezra, I see you're reclining cutely on the huge leather couch that all new college teachers get in their gigantic offices. Can I have a moment?"
Ezra, verbatim: "I can offer you chocolate milk! Or an apple."
Ella: "Saints fucking preserve us. Listen, you know how you're fucking my child daughter? I just wanted to drop by and talk about talking about that -- again -- and assure you that I am still not cool with it. Despite your adorable fucking outfit making me want to cry and pinch your cheeks. I'm not your ally, I'm just not my husband. Don't go thinking I care that much."
Ezra: "Are we going to talk about the NOLA thing?"
Ella: "I do not have an opinion about my husband's manipulation and paranoia."
Ezra, amazingly: "...Yes, you do."
Ella, charmed: "Yes. I do. Damn, I forgot how cute you are. I gotta go. That was freakin' awesome."
Ezra: "We'll win you over in the long term, Ella Montgomery! If only by the fact that we have more chemistry as actors than anyone besides Spencer and Everyone do!"
Ella: "...I know it, man. It is killing me. So listen, has Aria ever mentioned a bully, or... That's not the right word. It's less like 'bullying' and more like a 'nightmarish game of cat and mouse from beyond the grave.' Ever mention anything like that, while you dorks were putting on paper-bag masks and lasciviously holding hands and drinking chocolate milk?"
Ezra: "No, despite all evidence to the contrary, I haven't noticed anything of the sort."
Ella: "I'm just working with what I'm working with, so I have no reason to think this isn't all about my family. In that context, do you have anybody after you that might be ricocheting onto me?"
Ezra: "Just Jackie Morales, but I murdered the shit out of... I mean, she is no longer a problem."
YR MY WONDERWAAL PART II
Mona: "One of these days I'm gonna take that blind people cane and beat her line a piñata."
Mona: "Sorry, that was harsh."
Hanna: "No, it was incredibly funny, but that bitch has ears like a bat."
Mona: "She stole Noel Kahn! Without even Cyclops eyes! What about when she has eyes, how scary will she be then? Maybe we should lure her into a house and blow h... Never mind, what were you saying?"
Hanna: "Uh, remember when you and Emily both went totally gay for her that time at Halloween?"
Mona: "Good thing Spencer is no longer involved with any of those Boo Radley motherfuckers."
Hanna: "Mona, you have got to calm down and you have got to keep your voice down."