It's a Father-Daughter Freakout! While normally the idea of any kind of father-daughter dance in Rosewood would have me clutching at my Purity Balls in terror, this one was actually kind of sweet. It's nice to know that a show so honest about the predatory nastiness that surrounds you can balance that out with some positive male images on occasion, if merely to demonstrate that they're technically possible.
Emily's dad, for example, uses his Patriarchy Power of being in the military and talking to other dudes from the military to help her track down Maya's last known location, although that's a dead end since she probably got into a car with A before she ever left for San Francisco. It's a bittersweet reunion, considering he's shipping out again, but it seems left in the air as to where that puts Pam, moving forward.
Or how about Peter Hastings, who paid a PI that $15 grand to track down Alison so that he could prove Melissa didn't kill her? Yeah, turns out she was only one of the people sending Ali threatening texts, which is why Jonah led us to that law firm. Over the course of the episode, Spencer flips over on whether she killed Ali like a dozen times, but who knows. I still don't trust her, not that Peter's hotness is that trustworthy either... All I know is, A stole his gun and he's probably going to jail whenever A kills whoever is going to die.
Even little Mikey Montgomery gets some time in the sun, first advising Aria to drop Fitz and go back to being normal, and then telling Byron to lay off her and try to figure out where things went wrong. Byron, less amazing, although of course Ella and Ashley rock the house as usual. To throw Ashley off A's trail, Hanna lays waste to yet another phone before Mona suggests that Aria simply confess to being A so Ashley will leave it alone. Ashley doesn't buy it, in an actually very surprising twist, and ends up taking her A story to Ella, who knows exactly how scary A can be and warns her to tread lightly... Which, of course, A overhears.
(Oh, and the most amazing part -- beyond Hanna destroying her phone and the dropping the mic on her mom -- is when, during the dance itself, Toby rides up on a motorcycle and then speeds away into the night, sending Spencer's heart atwitter and crushing my Wren dreams anew.)
As everybody deals with the aftermath of yet another horrible town function, Aria gets another call from Jonah: Apparently there were multiple numbers sending Alison threatening texts and emails -- of course there were -- and he's somehow located the origin of a second one: a completely terrifying doll hospital in nearby Brookhaven. As the girls commiserate on how they once used to actually enjoy dolls, Aria puts on the red coat -- transforming into Vivian and summoning new hottie Duncan into the picture.
Two episodes left! In which... Toby is back in Jenna's thrall, with a cute haircut! A is revealed! And Jenna and possibly Hanna are blown up once again! God, I love this show. Of course the second Jenna gets her sight back they're gonna blow her creepy ass up again. And of course Hanna is going to run into a house that's about to explode. Of course those things. I cannot wait!
Mona gave Hanna gave Ashley gave Wilden the police report from the time that Hanna was caught shoplifting and Ashley used her wiles to get her out of it. Vivian Darkbloom's old friend Jonah proved helpful, despite all his efforts to the contrary. Wild suspicion and paranoia once again landed firmly on the Hastings House after Jason's paternity exposed Melissa and/or Peter Hastings as criminals, murderers, or even A herself or himself. Ella tried to pacify Aria with some pipe dreams after she found out Byron was trying to buy him off. Melissa was in Ali's bedroom at that last fateful meeting of the NAT Club, and the next young lady of Rosewood to go missing is Miss Maya St. Germain, formerly of the same address and bedroom where Alison herself used to live...
Hanna: "So what did the cops say about Maya?"
Emily: "Not much. I just refused to help them in any way and they left. Kind of disappointed-like. I think maybe she ran away."
Hanna: "What makes you think that?"
Emily: "She told me she was going to run away. And they said they found a note that she was running away and a bag of her stuff was gone. The only weird thing is she hasn't answered any of my calls or texts over what seems like the last hundred episodes she's been missing."
Hanna: "Those are the kind of things you might have told the cops."
Emily: "I don't work for those pigs."
Hanna: "Then I hope she calls you, and hasn't been abducted or brutally murdered. Because you would then have been in a position to help and kind of didn't."
Emily: "Name one fucking person who would care if she died. Honestly, to themselves."
Hanna: "Point taken."
Melissa: "All I did was ditch you at a gastropub and run off with Garrett while lying about it. Why are you acting so weird?"
Spencer: "BECAUSE YOU ARE SKETCHY AND DID ... WHAT YOU JUST SAID."
Melissa: "Okay, here's the deal. Garrett and I are friends now..."
Spencer: "And also from when you were in that video camera cult together in high school?"
Melissa: "...After my husband chased you through a church and then committed suicide -- a year after fucking and murdering your best friend -- I needed a chum, okay? Maybe I shouldn't have told him everything I know about you and your friends and how you're this incredibly insightful pathologist with the mind of a serial killer who is onto him and has evidence linking him and his ex-girlfriend and my dead husband to the murder..."
Spencer: "Yeah, maybe."