Pretty Little Liars
Father Knows Best

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Who Run The World?

Hanna: "I don't pay a lot of attention, so you don't even have to try that negligible amount. Meanwhile, I just got off the phone with my dad, and he's missing the Father/Daughter Dance."
Ashley: "Did he say why?"
Hanna: "He hates me? Business? Something about taking Kate instead? I dunno, he's kind of a non-factor."
Ashley: "Would you like me to take you to the Father/Daughter Dance?"
Hanna: "It's not very often that I am smarter than somebody else, so I'm gonna savor this."
Ashley: "No, I mean everybody's divorced these days, so there will be plenty of non-standard Father/Daughter Couples there. Let's be one."

Oh my God, what if Paige and her Star Trek dad are there? And then Emily's dad and him can get into a fight in their uniforms? While Byron sits in the corner sucking on an olive with that face of his?

Or wait, no, what if Ezra Fitz is there as a chaperone and they play "Father Figure" by George Michael and everybody stands perfectly still -- floor cleared, jaws dropped -- as Aria and Ezra Fitz take the blue-lit stage for their first dance as a public couple? Holy moly. That is the best idea. "Put your tiny hand in mine," he'd lip-synch, and then do that embarrassing nose-scrunch thing Patrick Swayze does at the end of Dirty Dancing that people do when they're lip-synching, the head-banging while biting your lip thing, and oh man. What a shitshow that would be. What a tremendous happening.

SCHOOL

Do Mom & Dad know you're watching murder movies? Bet it would kill them to find out! -- A

Aria: "Is A talking about the NAT video?"
Liars: "No, you half-wit. He or she is talking about literally anything else that exists."
Hanna: "So that's cool that your sister is just going to murder our parents now, just like that."
Spencer: "Okay, I know I've been kind of whiplashy about this, but I'm back to thinking Melissa doesn't have anything to do with this."
Aria: "Uh, I seem to remember an abandoned law firm, and a hobo that took me out."
Spencer: "I mean yeah, she was sending Ali psycho emails and texts, but that's not like surprising."

Spence also points out that A pretending to be texting Melissa from Ian's phone while also setting up his corpse in a sick tableau and leaving it there for weeks while she was pregnant with his child, so like, Melissa-as-A is actually more fucked up than if A really is a ghost ninja.

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Pretty Little Liars

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