Dad: "Buy a handbag. Buy Spencer some solid, non-caffeinated food. Anything but drugs, lol."
Emily: "You say you don't want me to be guilty, but everything you do is specifically things that make me feel guilty."
Aria: "Listen, while Mom's all doped up on bee drugs could you talk her into running away with a young hot barista?"
Byron: "Even I, Byron Montgomery, have a point about how that's a fucked up request."
Aria: "Just release her. Trust me, it's breaking my heart too."
Byron: "If this means I'm going to have to parent my children, I am not for it."
Aria: "We'll probably all be dead soon anyway. Just do it."
While Hanna is picking the lock on mom's gun closet, Emily and Spencer hit campus with Brendan. Today he's wearing a pale blue button-down and lovely beige jacket, recklessly pairing it with some black chinos, to turn his height into the illusion of upper-body breadth. It works perfectly because he is perfect.
Brendan: "At the Regents' Tea, talk about Kierkegaard because the head of Humanities is..."
Emily: "Can I get a sorority scholarship and does it involve pompoms?"
Brendan: "You have your girl things mixed up!"
Emily: "Haha! Not because I'm a lesbian though."
Spencer: "This idiot actually thinks we want to go to this shitty school. Instead of being here on the orders from a bird that has disappeared."
Emily: "But Spencer, I do want to go to..."
Spencer: "So here's the plan. Keep working him because he's in love with you, and then ditch it when he is at his most vulnerable and suspicious. Meet back here, and we'll do spy stuff."
Emily: "But Spencer I actually want to attend a college of some kind and I..."
Spencer: "Real life doesn't matter. Just do these weird things with me and shut up, okay?"
Hanna gets into the closet and finds her parents' gun instantly, just as the door downstairs is slamming shut. Is this a dream? No, it is real life. What will she do with the gun? I don't know. Did we ever replace the blender? If not, there's always the garbage disposal.
Hanna: "Spencer, I have real-life things going on! I need advice."