Pretty Little Liars
It's Alive!

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Tear Off Your Own Head

Caleb: "So hey, I unskipped town."
Hanna: "Stop looking at me like you're in love and being totally gorgeous okay?"
Caleb: "I gave a letter to Mona, which you ignored. Unless something obvious happened that we're both too dumb to figure out? Just in case, these are the contents of the letter, verbatim."

Dear Hanna. It is hard to be a werewolf, subsisting entirely on the barter system and cybercrimes. Nobody understands me and I felt so alone until I met you, because you were raised by wolves. The differences between Ashley Marin and a corrupt foster-care system are minimal. Also, when we fucked in the woods that part was awesome. Love, Cyberwolf.

Hanna: "I don't know that Mona would have tossed a letter like that. She tends to act selflessly and with a cool head."

Caleb: "Right. Okay, anyway I am in love with you. I'm sorry that I did cybercrimes on you, forcing you to beat up a blind girl in the school bathroom."
Hanna: "I believe that you are sorry, and that you love me and we love each other. But it is hard to forget that you did those cybercrimes, because I am in a state of constant and very justified paranoia. It's not you, it's me. Me, and the serial killers that hound my every move."

Caleb: "Okay, I won't ask for further information. Goodbye, Hanna. And whatever anybody tells you, it's not gay if you do it in an SUV."
Hanna: "...Wait, what?"
Caleb: Vanishes into the night.

MONA VANDERWAAL OVERDRIVE

Mona: "Hey, betch! Let me borrow that top!"
Hanna: "I know you trashed that letter from Caleb."
Mona: "Like Caleb can read. It was mostly just chicken scratches and some dirt."
Hanna: "Not cool, 'Sweetie.'"
Mona: "I saw red, I'm sorry. I honestly was trying to do the right thing like just one time."
Hanna: "As a teenage girl, it makes total sense for me to say this. What Caleb did -- screwing me in the woods and cybercriming my nannycam simultaneously -- that hurt. But what you did hurt worse."
Mona: "As a teenage girl, that makes total sense to me."

Noel Kahn: "Hey Mona, sorry I'm late... For our date!"

Yes! That is AWESOME! I love this show!

Hanna: Bounces, because watching Mona kiss Noel Kahn is just too weird, and also, way to pull focus, Noel Kahn.
Noel Kahn: "Mona, are you okay?"
Mona, crying with Real Emotions: "Just smoke my cigarette and hush."

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Pretty Little Liars

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