Hanna: "Talk him down, please. He loves you almost as much as he does me."
Caleb: "Speaking of our same-sex romances, I need you to stop visiting Mona."
Hanna: "That's so cute that you even said that."
Caleb: "That was not an answer."
Hanna: "Well, I have the subtlety of a hand grenade, so..."
Jenna: "So thanks for changing your mind about being my accompanist."
Aria: "Well, stage fright is a weakness of character."
Jenna: "You just gotta look it in the eye. That is looking at you because it isn't blind."
Aria: "Was that a clue, or...?"
Liars: "I can't believe she said the word eye to you. What a bitch!"
Aria: "Sometimes I feel like we're just playing out Alison's programming when we act horrible about Jenna Marshall. She told us to hate Jenna, so we still do, no matter how silly or counterintuitive it gets. It's like this secret funeral for Ali that we don't even know we're still doing, years later."
Liars: "Or she's a brother-fucking bitch."
Aria: "Can't it be both?"
Hanna: "Remember when Aria knocked over that beehive? That was hilarious."
Liars: "Yeah, ha! Wait, that was you who did that?"
Hanna: "But isn't it funnier if it was Aria who did it?"
Liars, incl. Aria: "...Yeah, you're right."
Emily: "For some reason I got a 94 on that English quiz, which makes me wanna kill myself."
Liars: "Stop saying Spencer things."
Emily: "No, it's not because it's too low, it's because it's too high. I didn't even finish that test, I was too busy randomly remembering this one time Jenna kidnapped me."
Liars: "This is the most Emily problem. You're going to graduate high school, ya gift horse mouth-looker."
Emily: "No, think about it. This is exactly how the pain cream thing went down."
Liars: "Actually, okay. It is starting to look like something A would do, you're right."
Aria: "You guys are so paranoid all the time!"
Liars: "SHUT UP, ARIA. GOD."
WHAT IS THE OPPOSITE OF THE BECHDEL TEST?
Caleb: "Hey, don't set our girlfriend on fire anymore, okay?"
Lucas, verbatim: "Sorry about that. I was being ground down by a trivial bureaucracy."
Caleb: "We're worried about you. Ever since Hanna tried to drown you, and Mona turned out to be living in an adrenalized hyperreality, you've been acting tweaky."