Pretty Little Liars
Love ShAck, Baby

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 34 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Suzy Clueless & The Secret Of Killingworth
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

PREVIOUSLY

Spencer was suspicious of her father's weirdness about his bastard babymama next door, Jessica DiLaurentis, and then suspicious of his motives regarding her investigation into Radley Sanitarium's sordid history, and in other news Spencer was suspicious about some things for once. Hanna was in whatever the opposite of two love triangles is, between not dating either her hard-luck tow-truck cowboy nor her spun-off werewolf boytoy, plus fighting over somebody who is not her boyfriend with somebody who is dead and therefore will not be showing up for any fight about boys. Oh, and she's been hanging on Ali's diary since Ravenswood because it has many secrets, particularly one silly secret we'll find out about tonight that Alison convinced her was the worst secret of all time (that Hanna is a fat child molester).

And on a completely different topic, Ezra invited Aria to his secret cabin so they could share a secret, actually saying "It can be our secret" in the process. So. You can already see how the ironies there will play out once we start getting into the child molester portions of Alison's diary, which -- it being this show, this town, this girl -- most likely represent the bulk of Alison's diary.

MAUSOLEUM STILL

Aria: "But like, why is she keeping a diary about other people? What on Earth could people that are not us have to offer?"
Hanna: "No girl, it's a code. Like she would actually have a friend named Suzy Clueless. Come on, idiot. No, she changes the stories around so you have to decode them using the things you know to be true. It's a simple, time-consuming, complex and baroque system of narrative and counter-narrative bricolage..."
Emily: "The exact kind of shit she was always doing. Not only because she was a fucking liar, but also because that's so Alison. She probably composed these postmodern Nabokovian tales while she was flying her plane. I am so sick of this bitch."

Liars: "So you've just been hanging out with this diary containing all of our secrets? Doesn't that kind of deprive us of agency?"
Hanna: "It's not like, light fun reading. It's like if HP Lovecraft wrote Fifty Shades about little girls. I mean, let's talk about this."
Liars: "No! I want a turn. We teen girls love thinking about horrible things, because it externalizes our paranoia and discomfort with our own bodies. It's why VC Andrews was so popular and where Twilight came from."

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Pretty Little Liars

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