Mrs. Hastings: "Morning, sweetie. We were just saying how fun it would be if you, Melissa and the guy you've both dated who has now impregnated your sister were to work all day together at a Founders' Festival booth run by Sean Ackard's mom, the church lady."
Spencer: "Sorry, what part of any of that sounds like a good idea?"
Mrs. Hastings: "The sad truth is that your jury will be made up of your peers, and in a small town like Rosewood that means getting in good with everybody while the good-getting is good."
Spencer: "And since Mrs. Ackard is literally the most judgmental person on the planet, I should kiss her ass?"
Mrs. Hastings: "Precisely. And no more hanging out with that Toby. They'll think you started a club of people who have killed Alison DiLaurentis."
(Toby calls, of course, for their hourly meeting of the People Who Murdered Alison DiLaurentis Club so he can read the minutes; Melissa and Mrs. Hastings play keepaway with Spencer's phone for over an hour, tossing it back and forth over her head, because even though Spencer's Mom is actually pretty rad, and wrong about very little but especially not this, nobody escapes Melissa's black hole of suck.)
Hanna's still being super sad and Ashley's super worried about her, but I guess she's still going to wait for Hanna to explain herself and her sadness and what she's done with Caleb. Before Ashley can extend the "mental health day" privilege -- parentally known as the nuclear option for when things really are that bad -- Mona Vanderwaal appears with a sound like a big pink gum-bubble bursting and annoyingly asks if she can "steal" some coffee. I hate that, don't do it.
Mona: "I'm around so seldom that I can be pretty much bent into any shape this show requires, so this time I'm going for violently loyal. I can't wait to kill Caleb and I wish I could get in my time machine and kill him backwards because I'm such a good friend."
Ashley: "So you know the details of this breakup?"
Mona: "No ma'am, I do not."
Hanna: "My life is misery."
Ashley: "Is there any other level to your motivations in this episode? Besides how you're totally A?"
Mona: "No ma'am, there is not."