SHOWTIME:

Samara: "Emily, here's your dress. Oh, and here is a girl who is clearly my girlfriend."
Emily: "Which is weird, because we're dating."
Hanna, verbatim: "How come I have no date, and you have a date who brought a date?"
Quinn: "Anyway, I'm the fuckin' worst. Later!"

Who Looks Amazing: Everybody, but especially Ashley Marin and Mona, who is wearing these cute glasses in order to more fully focus her amazing bitch powers. All the moms are at one table, because we're supposed to believe the moms of the Liars ever, ever got along. On the other hand, they are drunk, so maybe that's how.

Pam: "...So now I just need to unload my kid."
Ashley: "I run a gypsy camp in my gorgeous home, maybe we can work something out. Tell me, how does Emily feel about living in a basement?"
Pam: "This is workable."
Ashley, slugging back that wine like she's home and it's 2:00 in the afternoon: "Let me tell you, Sistagirl, there is nothing better than the sweet anticipation of fucking your husband after you thought it was all over and he'd moved onto another woman named Isabel for example."
Pam: "Our friendship is... Unlikely at best."

Toby shows up wearing a suit, it's kind of cute. Mona does more of her stuff and sends Spencer over to Noel Kahn with the tribute CD that will obviously be going somehow terribly wrong thanks to A. Whatever keeps Noel Kahn happening.

Spencer's Dad Peter: "Jessica DiLaurentis! Sketchy things! At top volume! Inches from Spencer who Must Not Know what we are talking about!"
Alison's Mom Jessica: "Peter Hastings! Guilt and mumbles!"
Spencer: "I just don't know what to think! But apparently there's a connection between Jason and myself that involves our parents and his return to Rosewood. I'm sure I can figure out a way to blame Ian if you give me a minute. And Noel Kahn stops smiling creepily at me."

Aria: "Emily, are you okay?"
Emily: "Rassin'-frassin'... I'll tell you what, if I don't get to the bottom of this Samara stuff I'll go insane. I've already had two girlfriends abruptly disappear in the middle of their storylines. I cannot take much fuckin' more of this, not when I've got college admissions fraud and a serial killer on my plate too. There's only so much Emily to go around."
Hanna: "I'm fucking bored. I'm going to go steal some champagne like Summer Roberts in this same episode."