Dad: (Lets himself in; allows himself to watch the total cuteness of Hanna dancing around in the kitchen. Of course she spots him and of course she turns into a snarling beast, but not quite for the abandonment-issue reasons you might have expected.)
Dad: "Your mom's going to be late, between robbing banks and screwing cops, so I brought you Thai food for dinner."
Hanna: "Shit on your dinner. Why are you still in town pretending we have a relationship when really it's because you're still in love with mom?"
Dad: "Wish fulfillment is a dangerous thing."
Hanna: "See, I don't really give a shit what you do, because I am 100% over it, and this isn't wish fulfillment. This is me, being grossed out that you're pretending it's about me."
Dad: "Everything just got too real. The New Hanna is a spiritual x-ray machine and nobody can handle it. In fact, it's up to you if I even come to this fashion show, and that's only if you calm down and only if you mom is there and only if she's going to get drunk and snake her hand down my pants at some point."
Hanna: (Interrogates dinner, homework; ignores Caleb's existence; tries to dance herself back to joy but alas, the levee is dry, the Chevy will not make it.)
DROOGIE HOWSER, PHD
Aria's obnoxious and dangerous plan to provide Jason with a psychological breakthrough proceeds apace.
Aria: "Jason, what do you think about this picture on my ridiculous gothic laptop?"
Jason: "My dead sister looks pretty."
Aria: "And this one?"
Jason: "See above."
Aria: "What about this one?"
Jason: "That doesn't look too familiar."
Aria: "It's from the day that Alison got back from what she said was your grandmother's house in Hilton Head mere hours before the party in Spencer's barn from which Alison was abducted after a fight and then she talked to Toby Cavanaugh about sweaters and then she got a ride to the Kissing Rock, where Ian went down on her and didn't kill her, and then...?"
Jason: "Wait, what's happening here?"
Aria, swinging a feather back and forth: "Annnnd thennnnn?"
Jason, unfriending her mentally: "Um, this is gross and classless. I gotta go."
Mona: "HOLD! Becky! I told you no flats. I need to see you walk in heels. Or have you forgotten why we're even fucking here, you halfwit?"
Spencer: "Chill, Mona."
Spencer: "Jesus. I'm out."