THE CRATE: 10 HOURS AGO
Spencer produces a crate of a size that could contain an entire psychologist, if one were inclined to fold her, which appeared in her living room. On the top it is stenciled, OPEN OR SHE DIES. They open it, so she doesn't die. Inside there are three spooooky dollllls that can talk, and that look like everybody, except Emily. Who awesomely seems miffed.
Aria Doll, All Feathers & Eyeballs: "Make Jackie go away!"
Hanna, verbatim: "Is there a creepier word than creepy?"
The Aria Doll produces evidence of Jackie's plagiarism, which in this case is her article about this painter that she just apparently clipped out of a magazine which is in French. I can't believe half the people on this show work at this shitty college. Spencer starts to give them all a lecture about this painter, but Hanna shuts her ass down.
Hanna Doll, Formerly Fat With Wavy Hair: "Stop the wedding!"
Hanna: "I was probably going to do that anyway just by being my accident-prone self."
Spencer Doll, Crazy Eyes and Fists For Fighting: "Keep Toby safe!"
Spencer: "I guess that explains the brakeline situation."
Liars: "Somebody tried to murder your boyfriend this morning and you forgot to mention it?"
Spencer: "You guys, this shit happens so often I'm sure we forget half of it before these Pretty Little Meetings of ours."
Emily: "Why don't I get a doll? This always happens. I am the Mavis."
Liars: "Eyes on the prize, Fields. Maybe she's just bored of you. What are you, going to look even more anxious at all times?"
Emily: "Yeah and meanwhile this is like the first time A even noticed Aria was alive."
Things get a little embarrassing at this point, I'm sorry to say, as the subtext becomes text and we also get a "this is a brilliant plot twist," which is the worst thing that ever happens on TV, when they tell you that.
Spencer: "It's brilliant, actually. A is being our ultimate frenemy, forcing us to get what we want, but knowing that when we do..."
Aria: "All hell breaks loose. Like, it's one thing to kidnap our therapist, but we're talking about Ezria here. If I expose his ex-girlfriend's plagiarism,that could somehow be relevant to my life."
Spencer: "Yeah, and I have to break up with Toby."
Liars: "...Wait, what?"
Spencer: "I have personally seen A run over my best friend with a car, and push a man off a bell tower, and then fake his suicide. Three hardcore activities."
Hanna: "What are you saying!? Who got run over!?"
Liars: "Hanna, she's saying that A kills people sometimes. Or like this one time."
Hanna: "Got it. All up to speed, sorry."