Kate: "Why so glum, Hanna? Feeling a little hung*?"
Hanna: "Not as hung as my werewo..."
Caleb: "Hanna, go talk on your phone. I need to fuck with your stepsister's mind."
*(Nope. Not actually a term people use. Honest to Blog.)
Kate: "I guess you'll be the next thing I take away from Hanna, after her dad and her self-respect."
Caleb: "Yeah, it's really sexy how horrible you are. Just kidding! Nice backfat."
(Caleb, he listens. How perfect for Hanna that he listens.)
Kate: "Listen, as long as the grandma doesn't show up and kick me in the box this day is still going better than I thought it would."
Hanna's Phone: She is running out of air. That's not a metaphor, but it is possibly a reference to one of your many unexpected acquaintances that I have kidnapped.
GUESS WHAT: A SCARY BARN!
In Rosewood they have a whole audio tour about scary barns that you can go see and hear what kind of child-murders happened in each of them. If you do the whole thing, don't try to do it on foot, because there are fifty-seven scary barns in Rosewood. You can pick it up at the Visitor's Center, which is located in the middle of town, next door to everything else and every other place these people ever go. One cool historical thing of note, in fact, is that although Rosewood only has two streets, it has eleven dark alleys. Do not go in them.
GPS Lady: "You have arrived at your spooky destination."
Emily: "I better get out and make a bunch of noise instead of checking things out. I bet Dr. Sullivan will be inside that barn drinking some tea and ordering shoes online and she'll be like, That A is such a gracious hostess!"
RIGHT UP THE RECTORY
During the weird vows, all the Liars silently ask eachother where Emily is. Luckily their telepathy is working clearly but sadly there is no new information.
Weird Vows: "...But let each one of you love one another, but not make a bond of love. Let it be as a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup, but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread, but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous but let each one of you be alone, even as the..."
Hanna: "Hey, Isabel?"
Congregation: "Oh, here we go. I am so glad we came to this wedding."
Isabel: "Honey, I'm getting married right now."
Dad: "Hanna, whatever the seat of your pants is thinking right now, I want you to cram it."
Hanna: "I'm afraid this can't wait. Sidebar."
Isabel: "Let's go into the rectory."
Hanna: Giggles. Just kidding, she is about to barf from The Horribles.