Okay, that's legit fucked up. Not like "psychic inbred kid in the doll shoppe" fucked up, not "necklace of human teeth" fucked up, but that's pretty good. That's pretty freshly weird... Oh wait, it's not some Nabokovian thing about them all, including Mona and Harold, being merely the postscript of Alison's life? Or that the ceaseless revelations and obfuscations of Alison's death and constant rebirth have become and continue to become nothing so much as a palimpsest of repeated and reiterated desire and repulsion and self-annihilation? We're watching PLL, I mean, so clearly it's actually just a way for them to flip to a random page and on that page is almost certainly going to be Alison's awful teenage bubble-cursive talking coincidentally about how Byron probably killed her. Still very cool.

Liars: "Flip to a random page. Okay, there it is. A flashback about how Byron probably killed her. Bad luck, Aria."

The only thing I noticed in the actual writing was Alison bragging about how Byron was just a little bunny whom she was blackmailing, and this particular day was hoping to squeeze just and I quote a "little sumpin' sumpin'" more. I love Alison DiLaurentis, sure, but seeing those words in her dumb handwriting made me want to smack her. What a little asshole.

SUMPIN' LIKE A FLASHBACK

Ali: "Department Chair! Congrats. Now, how about a little sumpin' sumpin'."
Byron: "I have no more money for your extortions. I am tapped. Dry. And I also stopped fucking Meredith like months ago."
Ali: "Yeah, I'm sure Ella wouldn't mind then."
Byron: "If I give you more money, she'll notice!"
Ali: "Then use your big stupid brain to figure sumpin' sumpin' out. I got all the time in the world. I'll be back from Hilton Head by Labor Day, flying a private plane like most teenagers probably could, if they tried."

Byron actually scares her, with his vibes and grabbing, which is impressive considering the only other person who ever scared her was Paige McCullers, Actual Psycho. Not even wild-eyed Mona, not even getting texts from A -- her own frigging ghost -- seemed to freak her out, but those two? Hmm.

FOUND WOODS