Pretty Little Liars
She's Better Now

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 16 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Hot Tubs & Hand Grenades

Regina: Busts into the second verse, which apparently exists. Or else she's just freestylin' it, which I would also buy. If only I had learned about this song in my Civics class, but no. That was not on the syllabus.

FT FIELDS

Dad: "I don't see you being a prisoner in your own home for too much longer. I mean, how many people could possibly be involved in the vast conspiracy to destroy you utterly from the inside out, and also the outside in?"
Emily: "I mean, I'm pissed about this? In one way. But also, I'm still kind of dealing with the fact that I killed a dude. Remember that? So yeah, the quiet time is an unexpected balm, in some ways."

Then she flips out into some kinda heretofore unknown Zero Cool hacker personality and switches phones with her dad, to gain the power -- the power of the robot house app -- so that she can sneak out of her window. To go walk down some stairs with some girls, and violate the privacy of a disabled school janitor. Don't wanna miss that.

FOUND WOODS

Liars: "Emily, how did you get here?"
Emily: "Robot house, phone switch, whatever. Long story."
Spencer: "Step aside so I can flawlessly pick this lock on this poor guy's janitor closet and get all up in his sad shit in the late afternoon."
Liars: "Hey, here's that book he was writing in... Oh look, it's a thousand-page letter, in super scary crazy person writing, to Mona, about Christ knows what. And this is all happening in the back of Alison's diary, which I guess he thinks is Mona's diary."

Okay, that's legit fucked up. Not like "psychic inbred kid in the doll shoppe" fucked up, not "necklace of human teeth" fucked up, but that's pretty good. That's pretty freshly weird... Oh wait, it's not some Nabokovian thing about them all, including Mona and Harold, being merely the postscript of Alison's life? Or that the ceaseless revelations and obfuscations of Alison's death and constant rebirth have become and continue to become nothing so much as a palimpsest of repeated and reiterated desire and repulsion and self-annihilation? We're watching PLL, I mean, so clearly it's actually just a way for them to flip to a random page and on that page is almost certainly going to be Alison's awful teenage bubble-cursive talking coincidentally about how Byron probably killed her. Still very cool.

Liars: "Flip to a random page. Okay, there it is. A flashback about how Byron probably killed her. Bad luck, Aria."

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Pretty Little Liars

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