Pretty Little Liars
She's Better Now

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 16 USERS: B-
Hot Tubs & Hand Grenades


Emily: "Those bastards can play the Familial Concern Game all day long, I'm not telling them about the lighthouse or Halloween or... If they knew a quarter of the shit that is constantly befalling us, they'd ship me off to Guam. So, house arrest."
Liars: "Ah, Hanna. Aren't you supposed to be babysitting poor widdle baby Mona?"
Hanna: "First of all, be nice. Second of all, I'm dealing with a lot of complexity here."
Emily: "We should be try to be her friend. This is like, exactly why the Founding Fathers..."
(Record scratch.)
Liars: "Whoa! Did you just turn into Season One Emily? What the fuck was that?"
Emily: "No way, I'm a hard bitch now. But if Mona knows why Garrett died, I mean... It was right after he told that story about Aria's dad..."
Spencer: "-- Nerp. Nix. Ixnay. Do not talk about that. Bitch went ham on me about that earlier."

Too late!

Aria, appearing: "What's goin' on? I heard people talking about me, so you have my attention."
Spencer: "Nothing. I was just modifying Emily's behavior a little bit."
Aria, hysterical: "Oh, so we're not talking about Byron when Aria's around? Just talking about him behind my back?"

But then she does make a valid point, A-Team/Killer blurriness notwithstanding and going back to the gender confusion about the Queen of Hearts and her man-hands: "Do you honestly think my own father would go so far as to drug me and lock me in a box with a cute corpse?"

I mean, the adorable part is that because this is a thing that has happened to Aria, it's also the only thing that has ever happened. Like sure Byron would bury Alison alive and chase Ian and Spencer around a church and fake some suicides and whatever, leave shovels around willy-nilly, even bury some Tory Burch boots in a shallow grave, but God forbid he do anything to Aria Montgomery. That's just a bridge too far. That would make him a bad guy!

Mona: "Hello, Aria."
Aria: "Ugh, don't."
Everybody: "Fuckin' Mona. Let's be super mean to her, mostly by staring."
Mona: "This is exactly what I was afraid of."

One thing this near-perfect show never does, that I really kind of wish it would, is explain what people at large actually think or know. Like, did anybody know that Ian might have killed Alison, or was it just Spencer thinking it so hard we believed everybody else did too? The only for-sure thing I can think of is Garrett, everybody blamed Garrett. And Toby for blowing up his sister, right. Jason for... Nope, I never figured out why everybody hated him. And the girls are always so paranoid about being held responsible for shit -- mostly shovel-finding, granted -- but you never get a sense of public opinion.

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Pretty Little Liars




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