Uh, let me guess, because ruining Toby's life for his own good is like their favorite hobby. She's going to call the cops and tell them he's squatting at a church and about to leave their jurisdiction? Because that gets your ass kidnapped. Emily will tell ya.
Emily: "Toby, we need to talk."
Toby: "It's just my arm. I hate when you face that face my face makes."
Emily: "Before you dated Spencer, she was seeing somebody else. It was a bad idea, no matter how cute he is, but this time she's thinking..."
Toby: "-- What."
Emily: "Shit is about to get weird again. Spencer has wanted to tell you think for a long time..."
Toby: "Long time, huh?"
Emily: "Damn it Fields, don't improvise. Uh, I have to go."
Toby: "Just tell me who it is."
Holden: "Is it weird, lying to your parents like that all the time? Because Ella is pretty much the fucking best."
Aria: "Yeah, but lying to people is all I do, so... Are you trying to talk me out of this?"
Holden: "No! I love fake-dating you."
Aria: "Me too but like why?"
Holden: "Your friends think I'm gay, huh."
Aria: "Yeah. Which is fine! Be gay!"
Holden: "No it's cool because I'm pretty gay, but no. I'm not gay."
Aria, verbatim: "Okay, then what are you?"
Holden: "Outta here."
He is good at that. If by "good at that" you mean not worried about being blatant and in no way smooth about it and just running at a full tilt instead of answering questions.
Aria goes to that place to wait for Ezra, who is never going to come.
Ezra has a hilarious convo with an undergrad whose shitty short story somehow changes his mind and makes him believe in love again, by... I love this show so much. The kid turns at the door and quotes Basil King at him, because that is actually what college is like. A nightmare.
"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid!"
Neither of them know whom he's quoting, or if they do they think it's Goethe, like the rest of us do, but whatever, it is very fucking beautiful, the whole deal.