Pretty Little Liars
The Blonde Leading The Blind

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Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Spencer Vs. Human Emotion

He is good at that. If by "good at that" you mean not worried about being blatant and in no way smooth about it and just running at a full tilt instead of answering questions.

Aria goes to that place to wait for Ezra, who is never going to come.

HOLLIS COLLEGE

Ezra has a hilarious convo with an undergrad whose shitty short story somehow changes his mind and makes him believe in love again, by... I love this show so much. The kid turns at the door and quotes Basil King at him, because that is actually what college is like. A nightmare.

"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid!"

Neither of them know whom he's quoting, or if they do they think it's Goethe, like the rest of us do, but whatever, it is very fucking beautiful, the whole deal.

SADNESS OF ALL KINDS

Aria gets tired of standing around looking stupid, so she sits down to look stupid on a bench.

Emily nods at Spencer, who's crying beautifully in her bedroom: It is done. A ghost ninja broke my arm, and then my girlfriend broke my heart. Via a teen lesbian.

Ezra stonefacedly listens to Aria's obsessive, pathetic voicemails, and... Deletes them! Awesome! When did Ezra get hot, they'll ask, and the answer is: Today.

Aria grows old on that bench, turns slowly to stone. Birds settle on her. Nobody can tell.

LIES MY PARENTS TOLD EACH OTHER

Ashley finds the blender in the garbage, and Hanna confesses that she had a fight with Caleb that apparently involved ruining the blender. Ashley doesn't really inquire further about that.

Hanna: "Did you keep a secret from Dad?"
Ashley: "Comparatively less, I suppose, but I did keep a few things to myself. Like he repainted our bedroom one time..."
Hanna: "Anything bigger? Or less self-aggrandizing?"
Ashley: "Your dad's best friend Steve Anderson hit on me. I told Steve I'd tattle if he tried that shit again, but I knew it would just hurt your dad if I told him, so it was easy to decide. What's the big secret you're keeping from Caleb? Did you lie to him? Or was it to save him?"
Hanna: "Yeah, I can't really talk about it with you either. Plus I have a date with my gay stalker, so..."

ROSEWOOD GENERAL

Toby: "Hey, Dr. Wren. Hear you been fucking my girlfriend."
Wren: "I thought you guys broke up, sorry. Spencer certainly said she dumped you."
Toby: "My right arm still works, motherfucker."
Wren: "...I'll go. Cheerio!"

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Pretty Little Liars

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