Ali was at Spencer's, doing magazine quizzes and reading about German cannibals as you do, while downstairs the Hastingses were having at it.:
Alison: "Ready for this? Some dude in Germany went on a dating website and advertised for someone he could kill and eat."
Spencer: "Shut up!"
Alison: "I'm serious! And got, like, 220 responses. Why does every woman think that she can change a guy?"
There was a rimshot. (I am like obsessed with that case to this day. I don't even get why people like to get slapped around in bed, much less why you would want to eat somebody. To me they are... It's not a lateral move, I'm not saying that exactly, but for me they are similarly confusing. Why? How come? To what end?)
Veronica, downstairs: "...We've been neighbors for fifteen years!"
Alison: "What's going on? Are they splitting up? Do they do this every night?"
Spencer: "No, my dad's just upset because Jason gave Melissa a ride home from Philly, and they got caught making out in the car."
Alison: Love. Ing. It.
Spencer: "Ali, stop. I don't want to hear this."
Alison: "I do! Jason and Melissa? That's juicier than the guy that eats his dates!"
Veronica: "No harm no foul!"
Spencer: "My dad is freaking out over nothing. Melissa's obsessed with Ian, she doesn't even like Jason..."
Veronica: "She better not. That would be a match frowned upon by the Gods."
Hanna: "Sorry I wasn't answering calls, but Caleb has my phone. Hey, is that a huge birthmark on Kate's side? Listen, I've been staring at this photo with my thumb over the nips for like a week now and trust me, there is no birthmark on that picture."
Liars: "Show us!"
Hanna: "No phone. Emily, I bet you still have it."
Emily: "...Sigh, yeah. Ya got me. Here."
Liars: "Okay but to what end? Why would A go to all that trouble to Photoshop her body, if the aim was to humiliate her?"
Hanna: "You guys, clearly this is Kate's doing. It wasn't A. It's not always A."
Liars: "Ah, look at Miss Smartypants explaining to us the nature of things."
Kate: "Hanna, I don't care to hear your apology."
Hanna: "Kate, I don't care to say an apology. I care to say that it was you that sent that picture."
Kate: "Ridiculous. To what end?"
Hanna: "You Photoshopped it..."
Kate: "-- Not all of us have to work as hard as you, Hanna..."
Hanna: "You 'Shopped it, you sent it, you reaped the bitchy rewards. Exhibit A, your birthmark. Yeah, I saw it when you took off your sweater. Bam!"
Kate: "Fine! It was that, or wait for Spencer to send out those weird pictures of me from riding camp! You girls are bitches!"