Previously: Emily was juicin', Spencer and Mikey were breaking into all kinds of places, and Jason was developing lots of creepster pictures of Aria. Too bad Aria was petulantly ignoring Ezra's calls, or else she might have somehow heard about this. Too bad the other Liars forgot they all live simultaneously next door to each other, or else maybe they could0 have dropped by. Ah, well.
A SOMEHOW MAKES PUBLIC SCHOOL BREAKFAST EVEN MORE DEPRESSING
Emily: "Hey, we need to talk about Jason."
Aria: "I know, right? We totally made out."
Emily: "Hold up about the stalking, let's do some girl talk!"
Aria: "I really don't know what to tell Ezra. It seems like something he should know, but on the other hand I don't really give a care anymore."
Emily: "Oh, by the way, we found all of these home-developed pictures of you in his crawlspace darkroom barn."
Aria: "You seem to have buried the lede."
Spencer, dressed like the Phantom Zone: "You were asleep in them. Or maybe drugged."
Aria: "Why would you say something so incredibly creepy?"
Spencer: "Listen, you're just taking a vacation inside my weird mind. I have to actually live here."
Aria: "Okay, so pictures of me sleeping or drugged. Anything else you might have thought to mention?"
Spencer: "Just that if you don't stop flirting with the idea of Jason I'm going to have to sanction your ass."
Aria: "Okay. I can still hang out with him and goof around though, right?"
Spencer: "This kind of shit is why you're constantly getting molested."
Aria: "But Jason actually did help my crazy brother in some way, by not telling the cops about Mike's many break-ins."
Spencer: "Yeah, and I'm sure he really wants to help people at this school avoid the wacky weed, too."
Aria: "Okay, I'm taking what you guys are saying to heart. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go flirt with Jason DiLaurentis."
Emily: "I'm hanging by a thread here. Can I please have like one friend?"
Spencer: "First of all, I can't believe you didn't inform me of this. Next you'll be telling me they kissed. Anyway, I know you're feeling bereft and persecuted, I have to go dig through yet more shit of Ian's with Toby. Have you guys met?"
Emily: "I don't believe so, no."
Spencer: "Well, I'm just going to leave you here alone at school, okay?"
Emily: "Sure. What horrible thing could possibly befall me here, this early in the AM?"
A, instantly: "How about all your Alpha-Bits are the letter me, and there's also a note in there about how you're the weakest link and thus will be getting pushed until you snap. How you feeling now?"
Emily: "Dreadfully alone. That shit I pulled at the lesbian caucus is looking more and more like a mistake. I could really use a massage from a licensed caregiver."