With everybody worried about Jessica DiLaurentis and Alison still on the run -- now with the cops hot on her tail, thanks to Paige -- the Liars use Ashley Marin's new job as Jessica's assistant to crash a fashion show in the hopes of getting back into Ali's bedroom for this latest round of questions.
Spencer's contentious relationship with wonderful sober buddy Dean hits a snag when Jason DiLaurentis shows up in town and he won't let her go interrogate him. But after a very sweet, chaste night on the couch, Veronica sends him packing. Not her fault for assuming Spencer would do her Spencer thing as usual, but still sad to see her warming to the process at the moment it ends. While she does get time alone with Jason by the end, it's not really helpful, implicating Jessica as A once again and possibly Jason as her accomplice.
Veronica explains in a very touching flashback that everybody in both households kind of thinks Spencer killed Alison. And while we know that's not true, Spencer points out that somebody is in that grave, and with all the Ali doubles running around she very well could have killed that person instead. During the charity bridal fashion show, Spencer spots Jessica handing something over to a person other than Alison, and gets chased through the woods. And then -- basically as expected -- we find that A has provided her gown with secret finger bones of the dead girl, whom Gabe Holbrook now plans on exhuming (if there's anything left, after all the times that chick has been dug up and repotted).
Hanna is a reliable player here, as has come to be the norm, but her only main thing -- besides the beautiful physical comedy of Emily and herself waddling around in giant wedding gowns trying to solve crimes -- is that Travis eventually forgives her for how she never acts normal, and comes through for her bigtime at the show. In a tux, no less.
Emily, that was sad. She runs interference for everybody the whole time, pissed at Paige for bringing the cops into Ali's situation. And, as Paige always will, she comes clean pretty immediately, apologizing for acting like a nutty thug and admitting that her vendetta may have played a part in her decision. Of course, since it's this show, Paige's finest hour is undercut by Emily pretty much dumping her in her haste to get to Alison, who has summoned the Liars to Philadelphia (to a place that is clearly the gin joint from Spencer's fugue, which is fantastic I think).
In happier news, we not only get Ashley Marin apologizing to a mean boss -- always a poignant look on her -- but also: ELLA! Who comes back from Vienna to check on Aria's wayward marbles, as well as spill some personal beans. Aria comes at her like vicious whoa, which even Ella understands is part of the process, but later apologizes in her own way, which is when Ella explains that she's there to tell the Montgomery kids that Zack, the Barista of an entire Castle, has proposed marriage. It's a stunningly sweet and moving sequence of scenes, but of course you already knew that when I said ELLA.
So the new situation is that the heist of Jessica's fashion show actually did the trick: The Liars have gotten back in contact with Alison, and low-and-behold, she's actually willing to talk. They rush to Philly to find her, and we end on a cliffhanger regarding who is actually waiting when they arrive.
Next Week: Ali Tells All! Flashbacks to Ian, Jason, Melissa, Nerd Mona, Boardshorts, the whole fuckin' thing. And the trailer ends with all the Liars, including Alison, threatening to shoot A if she doesn't take off her goddamn mask and come clean.
(As for the bajillion references to a certain storyline from the books -- well, to two of them actually -- we'll see where it lies. But if you ever wanted to place your bets on that Theory we all know I'm referring to, now would be the time. Either way I am loving it, and this season as a whole... And most certainly you, my darlings. See you then.)
Emily got that money from the evil skull twin painting, along with information they all abruptly forgot about. Dean Stavros moved into Spencer's barn, so she would learn what a good influence even looks like. Jason saw some shit but he was drunk so who knows. Paige sold out Alison and Emily, sending the cops to Jessica, who is maybe A but is definitely all over Spencer's ass lately. And Ezra gave Aria his stupid book that also named Jessica as A, but nobody asked him why he let them get tortured throughout all of high school by withholding this information, because he is a useless pedo with no answers.
IN 48 HRS
Spencer will be stumbling around the woods behind her house, in a long bridal veil, for reasons that do not seem clear to even her. She will go ass-over-teakettle down an embankment, be menaced by hoodies in the darkness, and maybe step in a bear trap. She will be covered in blood and, spoiler alert, her dress will contain two entire hands worth of people bones! But she doesn't know that yet, because who could predict that astonishing circumstance. It's like that old joke: What's more surprising than a bunch of finger bones hidden in your wedding gown? A: Literally nothing!
But now is not then, it is now. Spencer is finally looking regular-gorgeous instead of zombie-gorgeous, and is dressed as a businessman. Aria's wearing a cheetah-printy burnout lacy thing in black that looks great with her hair and makeup, despite having a choker collar and a chunky necklace and a giant ring like a rapper would wear, despite also how much I hate the burnout lace thing. (Spoiler alert, everybody is wearing that crap in this episode, and it offends me. If we wanted to see your skin, you wouldn't need to be wearing clothes. Clothes that show strange random patches of skin are failing at literally their only job.) In other news that is not news, Emily looks fresh and fancy even in a shapeless sweater, and Hanna is also in glam business mode.
Emily: "Yes. My girlfriend appears to have turned Ali over to the cops and run off to Maine. That is indeed the situation. Which sucks because she seemed really rehabilitated for a while there."
Liars: "It sucks if this causes Ali's death, sure. But it could inconvenience us also, let's not underestimate that. We hate being called in for questioning."
Hanna: "Lest we forget, allow me to bang the drum once more that the human remains we keep finding in weird places and reinterring in her grave belong to just somebody."