Spencer: "Since when do you keep a diary?"
Alison: "Since forever... But you're gonna have to wait to read them until after I'm dead!"
Spencer: "Gruesome much?"
Alison: "Not being gruesome, I'm being mysterious. And don't act like you're not interested. The fact is, I'm writing them for you. They're beyond scandalous! And you're gonna need them if you're gonna carry on after I'm gone."
I mean, it's not every day that your best friend informs you ahead of time that she's writing you a blueprint for her impending murder investigation. (Unless you're on this show.) And I can see forgetting that particular day, honestly, until it's brought up by something random: Ali was always saying shit like that, and I'm starting to think all of it was important in just this way, which means they're always going to be having these random memory downloads because you would need Mona-levels of recall to remember the important stuff, since the important stuff is all of it.
BYRON & FITZGERALD
Ezra: "More tea?"
Byron: "Who said that? It's so dark in this apartment, it's terrifying! Did your power get turned off? Is that why you need a job?"
Ezra: "First of all, I didn't send her to you for ask for help."
Byron: "I know that. We are not the kind of men to be proactive."
Ezra: "And I didn't tell her not to inform you about my baby. That was a weird thing she did on her own."
Byron: "I realize you're angry at her -- angry enough to break up with her, maybe -- but that doesn't mean you should blame me for it, either."
Ezra: "Uh, no. I'm not actually mad at her, why would I be? You're weird. Now, give me a job."
Byron: "I can't. Sorry!"
Ezra: "Did you ever notice that we're both kind of dirtbags?"
Byron: "That's rude."
Ezra: "I'm just saying, you've got some nerve bringing up my bad judgment."
Byron: "I guess that's true."
Eddie: "Wait, and you can play the piano, too? We haven't had anybody this talented in here since..."
Spencer: "-- Don't even say it. You know my sister, she was here yesterday? We used to play four-handed pieces. Then I started sleeping with all of her boyfriends, and now we hate each other."
Eddie: "What did you do to her eyebrows?"
Spencer: "Yeah, that was new. Not sure what's going on there."