Prison Break
Bolshoi Booze

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Geary -- dead!
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously on Prison Break: it was like an episode of WWE Smackdown. There was the malicious tag-team bullying (Geary and Bellick teaming up against T-Bag). There was betrayal and scurrilous dispatching of rivals via head wounds (Geary and Bellick). There was a diva getting in the ring and getting a fat lip for her trouble (Linc and Jane). And there was a cage match! Naturally, the face (Michael) prevailed over the heel (Mahone). All this show needs now is for everyone to run around wearing shiny spandex tights and nothing else.

When we open this episode, T-Bag is still tethered to the radiator by his bad hand. Shrieking with rage and fear, he kicks at the metal radiator cover. The sirens sound louder (i.e. they're coming closer), and he ceases his rage-aerobics to check the door, on the off-chance that the sirens are but a clever ruse to draw attention away from the cops stealthily creeping into the foyer. It turns out the cops are not so much "creeping" as they are "rattling the door," and it baffles me that Bellick didn't leave the thing unlocked with a note reading, "Help Yourselves." T-Bag looks down at his hand as the police open the door ...

And then all we see is the empty house -- except for T-Bag's little pink paw stashed behind the radiator! Won't the future owners of the house be thrilled to discover that on move-in day! Also: I'm kind of bummed that Dr. Gudat's fine work was for naught; it makes his death seem even more pointless. Also, ewwwww. There is a hand cooking on the radiator.

Meanwhile, in Maljamar, New Mexico, Michael is busy trying to buy a case of fishing reel oil at Ray's Sporting Goods. He's doing this because it comes in the same small vials that the nitroglycerine came in. Michael adds a GPS locator to his tab. "You must do a whole lot of fishing," the elderly clerk observes amiably. "A lot of fishing ... but not a whole lot of catching," Michael mutters darkly in response. His tab comes to $96.23, and that is when Michael discovers that he's broke. Things like buying two junkers and paying for the no-tell motel room where Dr. Sara ditched him will do that to you, I suppose. So Michael just offers to buy the reel oil, and when the clerk wanders off, Michael attempts to walk off with the GPS system.

The old guy moves with surprising speed, sprinting across the floor of the store and grabbing Michael's arm to tell him to pay for the GPS locator. Michael knocks the clerk back into a display of Igloo coolers. Frankly, if you're going to be knocked into merchandise in a sporting goods store, better the hollow coolers than the bowling balls or ski poles. The guy rolls over and says to Michael, "Just take it. Please. Don't hurt me." A guilt-stricken Scofield takes a leisurely jog out of the store.

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Prison Break

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