Prison Break

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Undercover Brothers

Then we see Don Self, and my hopes that this show has evolved into a supernatural crime caper are cruelly dashed. But just imagine the possibilities! Michael as Mento The Amazing Mind, able to craft complex schemes and move things with telekinesis! Linc, transformed into a being of pure stone, adding an extra dimension of mayhem to LINCOLN SMASH! Sucre as a master thief, composed entirely of sugar and able to shapeshift -- so long as he's nowhere near water! Mahone as a twitchy dude who can shoot lightning bolts from his fingertips! And the disembodied head of Don Self floating behind them as a sidekick to their hijinks and antics! This is either the most glorious reinvention of a show ever, or the idea of chasing Nyquil with gin wasn't as sound as I thought.

We cut to some poor sucker breaking the news about the dead stooge to General Von Baldy. The general's all, "Politically motivated?" "Possibly an Armenian," says the poor guy. He continues, "Tip came into LAPD. The assailant thought the consul was at the event, Lisa's bodyguard got in the way." General Von Baldy is concerned only about Lisa making her flight. Surely the One World Conspiracy's vast tentacles of evil have penetrated every facet of the American aviation industry? There's no possible other explanation for why so many security lines are clogged with clueless dolts. They can manage to delay a flight until Lisa's on it. We then cut to General Von Baldy looking at a piece of currency -- perhaps Laotian? -- and contemplating how his nefarious plans are about to cause the banks to collapse in that country, or something. Perhaps he's merely reflecting on how awesome it was when the One World Conspiracy created, then popped the American housing bubble.

Back at Scylla HQ, Michael heads up to a catwalk for a tete a tete with Don Self. The agent breaks the news about Jasper and how the knowledge about the card-reader location was resting in Jasper's brain, and that is now resting on the floor of an apartment. Michael offers his condolences and adds, "First Bennett and now your guy, huh?" Don Self voices the fear that the One World Conspiracy is closing in on his little side project, then breaks the news that with Jasper dead, he's got no idea where the location for this thing is. Michael says, "We keep moving forward, Agent Self, no matter what." Don Self sighs and assents, then adds, "Regardless of what happens, I... I like your style, Scofield." He leaves, and Michael's look is a mix between annoyance and confusion. Did he just make a pass at me?

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Prison Break

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