Prison Break

Episode Report Card
Sobell: A | Grade It Now!
Veronica -- dead!

And we see that Bellick's looking at an empty storage locker. Behind him, someone says, "That son of a bitch set us up!" As I collapse back on the couch, completely wrung out by that dramatic tension and the bait-and-switch editing, we see Team Escarpara closing their garage door thingy and heading off with landscaping implements in hand. They walk across a graveyard and stop at a specific gravesite. Then, all five cons begin digging.

Cut to a surly Bellick stomping past Mahone and Ives. Mahone gives him a look and Bellick snots, "Not one word" as he goes by. Mahone goes to flag down another officer, and as the youthful man turns around, Mahone hyper-focuses on his nametag; it reads "Rivers." A light bulb goes off over Mahone's head, and he flashes back to the "Ripe Chance Woods" tattoo. He shakes his head, saying, "Nothing," then comments to Ives, "That kid's clever. It's not a place, it's a name. Your PDA, you got it? Bring up the census for this county, as far back as it goes."

Meanwhile, Team Escarpara is digging away. C-Note winds up for a monster complaining session, but Linc curtly tells him to keep digging. Sucre crosses himself and informs them that they'll all be going to hell. Yes, it's the grave desecration that'll send them there, not the murdering, the thievery or the lying. Michael eventually pulls up some well-filled Hefty bags and C-Note says conversationally, "You are one sick cat. You know that?" Heh.

Ives's PDA is chugging away, and once Mahone finds a specific name, he bids Ives to drive them to the cemetery. Again, let me reiterate that I like the idea of Michael having a brainy nemesis but jeebus, let's not make him capable of deciphering all the clues on the first go.

Back at the cemetery, Michael is hauling out clothing and explaining that he'd only packed enough for a week's worth of outfits for him and Lincoln. He adds, "But I figure you need as much help as we do --" "So you're just doing this out of the goodness of your heart, Fish?" Abruzzi asks snidely. Michael shoots back, "That's right, John. The heart -- you remember what that is, don't you?" C-Note comments on the fit of the clothes with, "Damn, snowflake, this is tight, man." Sweet fancy Moses, is there nothing he won't complain about? "Damn, these diamond shoes aren't so sparkly at night! Damn, this pillow made of hundred-dollar bills isn't cushiony! Damn, the ability to fly means I get gnats up my nose!" Come on. Michael points out that the whole reason to get out of the prison blues is to avoid looking like escaped cons, so cram it and get some clothes on already. Cue the getting-dressed scene, wherein we all learn that dang, the actors on this show must be sit-up machines. Everyone else is in things like jeans and tees -- Abruzzi notes that the pants are a tad too short on him, giving him that hipster-doofus look so popular in the Mission in the 1990s. However, Michael is looking bandbox-perfect in a khaki traveling suit and crisp blue button-down. Linc, meanwhile, has decided to skip wearing an undershirt. And to skip wearing a tie -- he's got on a navy sports coat and a blue button-down unbuttoned about halfway to his navel. Next to me on the couch, Mary-Lynn lets out an involuntary whimper. Then we spend the next ten minutes rewinding that scene and watching Linc walk by over and over because that look, it is a mighty good one on him. Who needs a tie when you have pecs like that? Sucre begins complaining, and Michael snaps, "You want variety? Hit Target." Sucre and his newsboy cap give Michael a look like Why am I always the one you snap at? Where is the love for the guy who likes to talk about your feelings with you?"

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Prison Break




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