Prison Break

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Jacob Have I loved, Yet Esau I Have Hated …

Then again, neither is Dr. Sara, as she's the other genius who just left Christina alone and unsupervised in the bathroom. And what sorts of things are in bathrooms? Razors, scissors, nail files, nail polish remover ... You would think these two would have learned something from their experiences in outwitting their captors -- namely, the lesson that one should always ask, "Can my captive outwit me?" But no.

Anyway, poor Michael is sobbing again. Understandable, as torturing one's previously-thought-dead mother will put a strain on the ol' psyche, as will discovering that your brother is allegedly not related to you. (Also: I find it hard to believe that in his prep for the prison breakout and escape, in his discovery of the conspiracy, Michael didn't get a hold of Lincoln's medical/prison records and note that maybe, they were different blood types or something. He's likely to have found this information on his own, and had we known all along that he regards Linc as the brother of his heart, not his DNA, this story could have played out in a way that is much more rewarding to those of us who have been watching a show ABOUT TWO BROTHERS for four seasons.) Dr. Sara soothes Michael, tells him to go to Lincoln, and assures him she's got Christina. Michael pats the gun on the console and says, "If she gives you any trouble, if she gives you any trouble ..." He can't bring himself to finish. Dr. Sara promises that she's on it like a sunbonnet. Michael makes his sniffly exit.

Meanwhile, remember how I was nattering on about all the stuff in a bathroom. Guess what Christina just realized?

We zip across town, where General Von Baldy is taking a brief time out from torturing Sandusky to conduct an interview, telling T-Bag, "You have surpassed expectations, Bagwell. You're more than an informant." "I multitask," T-Bag replies modestly. Oh, Robert Knepper, you are truly a jewel beyond price. General Von Baldy tells T-Bag that he'll be "rewarded accordingly." "As a special liaison to the [One World Conspiracy]? What exactly does that entail?" T-Bag fishes. General Von Baldy replies vaguely, "Well, that would be up to you. Most [One World Conspiracy] operatives choose their own career paths. I can't say what would suit you. What do ... sexual predators from Alabama typically do? Aside from the obvious." T-Bag is on his best job-interviewing behavior as he avers, "Those days are behind me, general. What I lack in formal education, I more than make up for ... natural skills and curiosity. And as you've seen, my loyalty knows no bounds." The general replies, "Then you shouldn't have any difficulty passing your final exam." It's a one-question test: Can T-Bag kill Lincoln once the big lug's brought Scylla to Los Angeles? T-Bag is like, "I have been studying for this exam for what feels like four years!"

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Prison Break

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