Private Practice

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: B+ | 7 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
What They Can't Have

Addison's with a couple joking about studying when Sam comes in and greets them "Elisha and Esau." They apparently argued their dissertations last week, so they're off to Vegas to get married by Elvis, which Esau (who has a fake accent) says is the "ultimate American wedding." Oh, and Elisha's totally pregnant, which makes that even more true. Sam and Addison check out the baby on ultrasound and they tell her the baby will need heart surgery shortly after birth and often again thereafter. Esau keeps coughing, and Sam pulls him into his physical, which he has to get to renew his green card, apparently close to expiring. It's just like a Ph.D. student to put off renewing their green card, isn't it?

Charlotte happily heads into Violet's open office only to find Sheldon there, looking through Clea Duvall's file or something. Charlotte wonders who drops everything and disappears, and she's totally not talking about Cooper. But she tells Sheldon she and Cooper slept together in the bathroom at Maya's wedding. Sheldon helpfully offers that maybe Cooper's trying to figure things out, but Charlotte says, "Maybe he's just an ass." I vote the second one.

Naomi's with a patient of the week, and her British boyfriend. Basically, she's a heavy-ish woman who never thought she'd found love until she met this completely gay guy online. He sells lilies online, even. That's how they met. Her name's May and they make a "Henry and June," but one month off joke that makes her laugh until she cringes in pain, bringing them to the point: They had sex and she's in pain, like totally burning in pain. Which is ridiculous since they just had that whole romantic conversation. Naomi promises to get her back on her feet, "so to speak."

This will come as a surprise to no one, but it turns out Addison's one of those women who doesn't want the guy to move on from her even if she won't be with him, so she asks Sam if they're okay. He says they are, and she's like, "No, I mean about me and Pete." He's like, "Yeah, I knew what you meant, and we are cool." She tells him it's different with her and Pete than her and him, but he says it's water under the bridge. Pete comes in then, since Sam called him for a consult. Turns out Esau has tuberculosis. They wear masks in to tell Esau and Elisha. The doctors want to run some tests on Esau, but he and Elisha want Sam to lie so he can get his green card or he'll get sent back. Commercials. Did you know Outback supports our troops? What a controversial stand to take!

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Private Practice

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