Addison flips her lid when SWAT tells her he loves her. How dare he? She seeks her revenge by girling out, checking the call log on his phone, and following him to see if she’s cheating on her. He gets his revenge by having her arrested for impeding justice! Ah, love. It’s just so sweet.
This week’s Medical Drama includes not only a rare congenital syndrome that will have every pregnant woman running to her OB/GYN and demanding unnecessary tests, but a real live suburban bigamist! To top off the awesome, the bigamist is played by Wesley, a certain vampire slayer’s ersatz Watcher. Any Joss reference makes me happy!
Pete still doesn’t have anything more than a supporting role in this week’s episode, but he does get to call Addison out as an overstepper and threaten to call the AMA on her self-righteous behind. That’s definitely better than a defatillator!
Sam and Naomi work through their transitioning relationship by projecting all their emotions onto Billy Dee Williams (!!) and his frail and ailing wife. When Naomi performs some wacky Oliver Sacks mojo and wakes the wife up long enough for her to boss Billy Dee into putting her in a nursing home, Sam realizes it’s all going to be okay.
Violet slips on some gumshoes in order to find out who is causing all the construction racket on the fourth floor. When she discovers that it is Charlotte and her new (rival?) practice, she demands that Charlotte tell Cooper the truth or she will.
Speaking of telling the truth, when Cooper, Sam and Pete get sloppy drunk at an '80s bar, Cooper boldly picks up his girlfriend in front of the boys. When he sobers up and realizes he outed himself, he freaks out, feels ashamed, blames Violet, hugs Violet, and then confesses his love for the Devil that is Charlotte. Those are the five stages of hangovers, right?
Oh and Dell has a secret daughter who is, like, 12! And precious! And Addison might, just might, let him have an office.
Addison's hair is down and she is drinking wine and striking poses in doorways to impress her SWAT man. He brushes past her, tells her some boring work story, which she ignores because she is too busy making sexy horse face at him. He finally catches her drift when she grabs him by the belt buckle and attaches herself to his face. As they grope on the counter he whispers he loves her. Confused horse face ensues.
Cooper and Pete take Sam out to re-introduce him to the world of dating. Sam can't think of a single pick-up line other than "I'm a doctor." Which, come to think of it, is probably pretty effective. Sam confesses that Naomi asked him out in college and he's never really been on the market since. They all laugh and tease each other and Pete finds a girl for Cooper to test out his legendary mad skillz on. He's been watching The Pickup Artist and Mystery gave him some awesome tips he's dying to try out on the mystery blonde Pete chose. The blonde turns her head and it's Charlotte! Not surprising, but Sam and Pete are surprising in their venomous response to her presence. Why do they hate her again? It's been so long since she's done anything other than play naughty dress-up with Cooper that their level of animosity is surprising. Sam mentions covens and Pete bloodletting. Cooper takes a shot of something to pretend all is cool. Cooper uses his liquid courage to walk over to Charlotte. Much to the shock and amusement of the boys, Charlotte and Cooper walk out together in two seconds flat. Personally I'm not sure I would use my jaw if I had to pick it up off of the floor of that bar.
Violet yells at Dell, "This banging has to stop!" It takes me a minute to realize she isn't talking about all the gratuitous sex and lewd and lascivious content on the show, but about the actual banging from the construction going on on the fourth floor. Violet accosts Addison the second she steps out of the elevator to complain. Addison has her sunglasses on, affecting some ersatz Grace Kelly air, and doesn't feel like talking to Violet about the construction. In a very condescending tone she explains she called everyone she could, but the company has the right to build during business hours. McBitchy much? In the coffee room, Addison looks at Naomi, is about to say something, and then changes her mind. Naomi encourages her to go ahead. It's all good. They're fine. The writers must have realized that Addison and Naomi in a fight was completely annoying to watch. Even more annoying than watching them not in a fight. Addison tells her that SWAT said it. Yeah, it. Naomi figures it out instantly because she speaks fluent girl. She knows Addison has trust issues and all, but...whoa. Love so soon? Say nay. Or neigh. Their cupcaking is interrupted by Sam and Pete. Actually, Sam and Pete join the cupcaking because they have hot gossip about Cooper. And Charlotte! They all squee! Naomi looks really good today. Maybe it's her hair? Not sure, but she looks fresh and lovely. Makes you realize how frumpy she's been the last few episodes. Anyway, Violet walks into the hen party and totally ignores them as they pepper her with news and gossip. When Violet doesn't react to the news about Cooper and Charlotte, Naomi figures it out. Just as Cooper walks in, Naomi shouts: You're dating Charlotte King! Violet whirls around to deny saying anything, but Cooper doesn't believe her.