In a bar somewhere, Pete offers to buy a cute young thing a drink, but she already has one coming. Sheldon walks up and gives her a drink, apologizing for taking so long. Then he sees Pete and wonders why he's here. Pete says he's trying to have a little fun, just like Sheldon. The girl thanks "Shelly" for the drink and leaves. Sheldon is all "Right," when Pete tells him he is also single, and then he's like, "You and Violet?" Pete says he's not going there since tonight's about single women and booze. He says it's a big bar and starts to leave (also: a big city; go to a different bar, maybe?), but Sheldon calls him back and says maybe they could have been friends if it hadn't been for... that thing (Ha! Violet's a thing!) Pete won't talk about. Pete: "I doubt it."
Back at Oceanside, Bride can't believe Charlotte stuck a needle in Erection's erection, but he tells her it didn't hurt, since Charlotte froze it first. She says the next step is to insert a shunt, which Erection thinks sounds big. Charlotte says the only other option is to deglove the penis, which means making a circular incision around the glands, rolling back the skin, and squeezing out the blood. Cooper looks a little ill, but Bride loses it, and runs out with her hand over her mouth. She charges into the bathroom, where Violet's washing her hands. Bride drops her purse, and packets of Saltines fall out, then throws up in a stall. When she comes out, She picks up the Saltines, Violet asks her how long she's been pregnant. I think it's kind of a stretch to assume that anyone with Saltines is automatically pregnant -- especially because she could have had them to calm her nervous, wedding-day stomach -- but she was right, so I'll shut up.
Violet gets her way and is meeting with Bride, who's explaining that this wasn't supposed to happen when they made their virginity pledge. Violet says it's a difficult pledge to keep, and Bride agrees that's what her sister, Jenny, said at her bachelorette party. She says she and her friends were telling horrifying first-time stories and talked her into getting that over with before her wedding night so that it would be great with him. She thought he would just think it's his. Violet can't believe she was going to let him think it was his baby. But I can't believe if her bachelorette party was close enough to the wedding to make it seem like it could be his that she would already know she's pregnant. Violet says she can't start a marriage based on a lie and is going to have to tell him. Not that I would ever, ever listen to Violet's advice on relationships, but yeah, she needs to tell him.